Asian Men with Balls: The Sociosexual Implications of Linsanity

via HuffPost Gay Voices, by Justin Huang

I didn't pay much attention to Jeremy Lin until I realized he was getting me laid.

Story of my life: my insecurities take the form of mild to moderate narcissism and I ignore a cultural sensation -- the Asian Obama, if you think about it -- until it directly becomes pertinent to my sex life.

But there this pretty boy, whom I considered far out of my league, stood in front of me, offering to buy me a drink at Akbar, a trendy gay dive in the Silverlake neighborhood of Los Angeles.

The boy, whom I'll call Tim, was, I think, mixed-race, and generally too attractive for me. (I tend to like gruff guys, anyway, the type who look like they can take a punch.)

But it's always pleasant when an Adonis turns out to be good conversation, and after a few drinks, I asked him what he was looking for.

"To be honest," Tim replied, taking a swig of Anchor Steam, "I've been on an Asian kick ever since Linsanity. I think he's so hot, and I'm surprised I've never been with an Asian guy before."

Normally I don't like it when guys bring up my race when they're hitting on me. Without question, race is usually a major component of sexual chemistry (and I certainly have my own preferences), but there's no easier way to feel like a piece of meat than when you're being compared to an anime character. But this was different. And it was entirely new to me.

I was being likened to an all-American mainstream superstar, not a niche fetish.

Since then, I've gotten wing-manned by Linsanity on several more occasions. On my Adam4Adam account, I have a picture posted that features me clutching a strategically placed basketball. (I took this picture as one of the subjects of a photography project called Sexy Geeks.)

The photo shoot was taken months before Jeremy's Shakespearean rise to meteoric stardom, when the image of an Asian man clutching a basketball was meant to be a critique on societal stereotypes. How quickly things change.

Now, I'd gotten no fewer than 30 messages on Adam4Adam that directly comment on the basketball picture, gushing about Jeremy Lin.

I haven't really paid attention to the NBA since the end of the Golden Age of the Lakers in 2004. And the only reason I paid attention to that was because of the diva bitch fight that was the Kobe/Shaq rivalry. ("Just make out already!" I'd yell at the screen.) But this Jeremy Lin figure was ramping up my sex life, and I was curious as to why. So I Googled him.

On paper, Jeremy Lin and I have a lot in common. We are both American-born. We're both from good Christian families; we both were stellar students in school; we both grew up in California. Like my mom and dad, his parents came from Taiwan with hopes of a better future for their kids.

Like my maternal grandparents, his maternal grandparents fled China to Taiwan during Mao Zedong's takeover.

But the similarities end there. I was confused. Was it really just skin deep, this sudden spike in interest? Or is something greater at work here?

You see, I grew up completely devoid of any role models that I could physically identify with. I am a thoroughly Americanized Asian man, but I've always felt that when it comes to my identity, I am an army of one.

I feel marginalized by the stereotypes thrust upon me, even defensive. The image I present -- one that I believe makes me a serious contender in my social surroundings -- I've carefully cultivated myself, without a face to base it on.

Read the rest

Op-ed: Our Groups Need More Color in Their Rainbow

via Advocate, by Jimmy Nguyen op-ed contributor

The rainbow flag, the very the symbol of gay pride, represents both our aspirations and the diversity of our population. 

Yet the top of the gay community’s rainbow — the leadership tier of LGBT non-profit organizations — is more awash in white than any other color. 

At the executive director position, LGBT groups have historically been led almost exclusively by white men. 

A step down at the board level, gay non-profits have tried for years to recruit members who better match the racial diversity of America.

After all this time talking about the need for greater racial inclusion, it’s time LGBT entities did better in finding leaders who represent the full spectrum of colors.

The figures are troubling, especially at the very top.  In 2008, only 4% of executive directors of LGBT organizations were people of color.

That figure comes from The Pipeline Project, a group formed to develop LGBT leaders who reflect our multicultural, multiethnic community. 

It is a far cry from the 36% of the U.S. population who self-identifies as a racial minority.  And our 4% is one-third less than non-profit groups in general. 

While I have not come across more recent statistics, it’s hard to imagine racial diversity among executive directors has dramatically improved in the past few years.

Executive directors act as faces to the public of their organizations and the overall LGBT movement; it is critical that those faces be as diverse as possible.

Because the LGBT population is itself a minority group, it is sadly ironic that our organizations need their own diversity initiatives.

In the boardroom, the picture is better but still lacking.  At the major LGBT non-profit entities, only 25% of board members are racial minorities, according to the 2011 annual National LGBT Movement Report released by the Movement Advancement Project, which studies the health of LGBT organizations. 

Despite efforts to improve board diversity, the 25% figure has not materially changed from the prior year.  While the MAP study does not capture data from all gay non-profit entities, it represents a good cross-section.

The 2011 report (summarizing 2010 data) covered 40 of the most prominent groups that collectively control 71% of the budgets from known gay organizations. 

Luckily, LGBT non-profit entities are doing well at the staff level. 

MAP found that 32% of staff members at participating organizations identify themselves as people of color.

This more closely tracks with the 36% figure for the U.S. population.

Why is the leadership of our LGBT organizations so awash in white?  Let’s begin with the elephant in the room. 

The gay community needs to be more racially inclusive – not just in its organizational structures and political strategies, but in its social fabric. 

Ethnic minority groups still are not as integrated into the gay world as they should be. 

That isn’t to say Caucasian people have no racial minority friends, but it is a fair observation that their social circles tend to be less racially diverse. 

This spills over into the milieu of “A-gay” charity events, where the people who historically run the show (often gay white men) invite people they know (usually more gay white men than racial minorities) to attend, contribute money or support in other ways. 

Trust me, I’ve showed up at many gay fundraisers to find myself as an Asian man just one amongst a limited number of racial minority people in the ballroom.  That results in fewer people of color getting exposure to the good work of LGBT organizations.

In turn, this affects boardroom composition. With leaders of LGBT entities being less diverse, so too are their social circles, which they reach out to for recruiting prospective board members. 

This leads to a spiraling cycle that makes it difficult for non-profit groups to improve their ethnic diversity.
 
Adding to the challenge is the money factor. For executive directors and board members, a big part of their job is to solicit donations from people who have money or strong business relationships to leverage. 

That immediately starts filtering out some people of color from the contact list.  There are, of course, many LGBT racial minorities who are professionally successful. 

But it’s the cold hard truth that an income disparity still exists in America between whites and racial minorities (irrespective of sexual orientation) even with the same level of educational attainment. 

This monetary discrepancy leaves racial minorities less likely to be invited into LGBT leadership.  I’ve experienced this myself during my time on an LGBT board. 

I would look through my contact list to see who amongst my friends had the financial means to make a significant donation or had business contacts that would be valuable. 

Fewer of my racial minority friends fit that bill than my Caucasian colleagues.

Of course, there’s nothing wrong with having gay, white men at the top (just as there is nothing inherently wrong with straight, white male leaders). 

But we need more color not just for atmospherics; we need itto help win the gay civil rights movement. 


Read the rest

4 Colored Boys Like Me

via HuffPost Gay Voices, by Dane Harrington Joseph

I am not a racist.

There's a perfectly sound reason why my new project, Langston's, is subtitled "a film by (4) colored boys." Besides the obvious answer (it's a collaboration between four noted black and latino filmmakers), there's also a much more personal reason, dating back about 20 years to when I was a little colored boy myself (as my grandma would affectionately call me).

Back then, I would occasionally wet my bed at night. After such incidents I'd hide my gold-tinted "tighty whities" from my father, who would undoubtedly "whoop" me if he found them.

Nonetheless, despite my best efforts, he would sniff them out after they had festered for a few days in some ill-concealed location.

He would then call out for me in his ironically shrill, baritone voice, and, after a series of insults, proceed to beat me, accentuating verbally my various flaws with each lash.

My worst offense, however, would be crying, because "black men don't cry," an adage he'd bark at me whenever my eyes started to well up.

So I would just bite my lip until he was finished, then retire to my room and cry secretly into my pillow, all the while thinking, "I need help."

Of course, I didn't mean I needed to be rescued from my father's "tough love." Rather, I needed help controlling my compulsion to be me. I didn't want to be me. I hated me.

"Me" needed help, and I knew no other little "colored" boys like me who could show me the way.

So I looked to pop culture for guidance: music, movies, TV. Bill Cosby? No. Montel Williams? Denzel Washington? No. Flava Flav? Hell no.

There was not one media personality or public figure that reflected me. I wasn't relevant. I didn't matter.

I grew up, cried a little less, and, as a teen, became even more obsessed with the idea of finding someone to connect with -- other little colored boys like me. I discovered this newfangled thing called "the Internet" at the library.

I made new virtual "friends" and consequently put myself in unsafe situations, sexually and emotionally, just to feel something, to relate to someone.

I thought that love manifested physically between a 41-year-old Italian bear and a 15-year-old little colored boy could fill a void, could help substitute for the lack of love I felt for myself; it didn't.

I recall going to my mom a few months later and having her take me for my first HIV test, and crying, and then her crying, and then us crying again when the results came back negative.

And I remember thinking I would never be self-destructive in that way again.

I must admit, however, that the lure of boys and booze to fill a void still lingers, to gain instant gratification to temporarily replace constant feelings of illegitimacy.

And while this could, in truth, be the story of anyone of any race, I find that my existence as a gay man of color has rarely been validated; how I felt as a little colored boy looking to the media for validation still resounds today as a grown colored man.

Aside from a slew of big black men in pretty dresses (RuPaul, Tyler Perry, Eddie Murphy, Martin Lawrence, Jamie Foxx, and Flip Wilson, all of whom I admire, but almost all of whom aren't gay) and some admirable attempts by a few noted filmmakers (Patrick Ian Polk, Maurice Jamal, and Roger Omeus, to name a few), there has not been a constant presence of gay men of color in mainstream media or popular culture.

Coupled with negative societal perspectives on homosexuality, the diminished presence of black-themed entertainment that was so pervasive in the '80s and '90s, and the Euro-centric focus of most gay entertainment and advertising, it's not so surprising that self-destructive actions among young gay black men are on the rise, with the CDC reporting that new infections among said demographic saw a dramatic increase of 48 percent in recent years, with 59 percent of those carrying the disease unaware of their status.


Read the rest

Black and Latino MSM Identity and HIV Risk

via Poz, by Trenton Straube

New research uncovers mistaken assumptions fueling HIV rates among black and Latino men who have sex with men (MSM).

The belief that having sex with someone of your own race lowers your risk of contracting HIV is a misperception that needs to be addressed among black and Latino men who have sex with men (MSM).

What’s more, health care workers are missing opportunities to test this population for HIV—even when the men are engaged in care and disclose their sexuality to their doctors.

These are just two findings of research looking at black and Latino MSM who are HIV positive but unaware of their status. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) estimates that 53 percent of new HIV cases in the United States are among MSM and that 54 percent of these MSM are black and Latino.

In addition, HIV-positive black and Latino MSM are less likely than their white counterparts to know their status—which is one factor that amplifies HIV rates among these populations.

To explore these dynamics, researchers led by Gregorio A. Millett, MPH, the CDC/HHS Liaison to the White House Office of National AIDS Policy (ONAP), analyzed data from 1,208 MSM (597 black and 611 Latino) who participated in studies in Los Angeles, New York City and Philadelphia.

Eleven percent of them (18 percent black, 5 percent Latino) turned out to be HIV positive but unaware of their status (referred to as “HIV-positive unaware”).

Researchers found that certain variables were more common among the MSM in this group.

For example:

Black HIV-positive unaware MSM were associated with:

•Gay identity
•Earning a moderately higher income
•Having health insurance
•Disclosing sexuality to current health care provider
•Fewer than three lifetime HIV tests
•High perceived risk of testing HIV positive
•Belief that sex with other black men reduces HIV risk

Latino HIV-positive unaware MSM were associated with:

•Nongay identity
•High perceived risk of currently being HIV positive
•Belief that sex with other Latino men reduces HIV risk


POZ spoke with Millett, who arrived at ONAP via the CDC, about the implications of these findings, which were printed in the September Journal of Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndromes in an article titled “Mistaken Assumptions and Missed Opportunities: Correlates of Undiagnosed HIV Infection Among Black and Latino Men Who Have Sex With Men.”

We also asked Millett how his team in DC might use the data as they implement the National HIV/AIDS Strategy.


Read the rest

NABWMT Announces DIVERSE 2010 Celebration Waves

Part 2 (Part 1 was yesterday)

by Cornelius Mabin

Coordinated by National Association of Black and White Men Together: A Multicultural Organization for All People (NABWMT), “DIVERSE 2010,” scheduled for July 26- 31, 2010 in Fort Lauderdale, FL, represents a partnership of community and faith based organizations, businesses, and allies from around the country formed specifically to produce the event.

Coinciding with the 30th anniversary convention of the gay multi-cultural organization, the event will feature  3 “waves” or tracks designed to facilitate it’s chapter network’s viability and offer empowerment sessions, Fourteen workshops ranging from health and wellness issues. Featured presentations include one from Alan Dupuis, RN of The Pride Institute and a member of Gay and Lesbian Medical Association,  a cultural awareness presentation from author Dean Davis dealing with gay youth, and Hate Crimes and Anti-Gay Bias perspectives from the Broward County Sherriff's office.

NABWMT's  anti-racism program called the Bush-Mallon Institute, will also be re-launched as a centerpiece to convention activities.

Throughout the week, organizers created a “third wave” which has been designed as a expanded social networking opportunity of registrants including receptions, panel discussions, cultural arts, movies, swimming and nightclub events and a “Diversity Day Ft. Lauderdale” involving the local GLBTQ community at The Pride Center at Equality Park.

Participants from around the country are expected to attend the week’s festivities, which will be located at the Marriott Hotel in North Ft. Lauderdale, and at several bars and other locations in the gay friendly “gayborhood,” Wilton Manors.  For more information: www.nabwmt.org or 1.800.624-2968.

30 Years of Advocacy: Black & White Men Together Celebrate DIVERSITY

[part 1 of 2]

...commitment to a kaleidoscope of social justice issues rather than pandering to stereotypes or promoting a racist module of creating a group for people who prefer dating others based on their race or ethnicity. 

by Cornelius Mabin

The National Association Black and White Men Together (NA) is a nationwide collective network of affiliated and developing chapters in over 20 cities that identify themselves as Black and White Men Together (BWMT), Men of All Colors Together (MACT), or People of All Colors Together (PACT) in keeping with the cultural dynamics of their respective areas.

Conceived conceptually by Michael Smith in 1980 in San Francisco, the organization offered an outlet for individuals and couples sharing their lives inter-racially amidst racial challenges within gay male culture.

Two fundamental objectives guided the group and its many local chapters. First, was to explore our own attractions to men of different colors and ethnic backgrounds as well as it's impact in  a racially segregated society. And secondly, to began seeking answers about overt racism that were witnessed as a part of the gay construct.

With the success of it's initial beginning from posted ads in The Advocate and other news sources, BWMT's unique appeal and message grew additional chapters incrementally. Ultimately creating a national entity known as the "NA" to centralize it's leadership while designating support for local endeavors.

Continued development of the organization’s mission required additional structure and direction resulting in adopting it's Statement of Purpose citing NABWMT as “a gay, multiracial, multicultural organization committed to fostering supportive environments wherein racial and cultural barriers can be overcome and the goal of human equality realized. To these ends, we engage in educational, political, cultural and social activities as a means of dealing with the racism, sexism, homophobia, HIV/AIDS discrimination and other inequities in our communities and in our lives.”

During it's 30 year odyssey, the organization has pursued the course of addressing systemic oppression and cultural indifference with numerous coordinated projects such as a 1983 Discrimination Response System in reference to local bars with excessive carding  practices resulting in discrimination complaints with the Washington, D.C. Office of Human Rights. During the 1988 Boston convention, the group formed the National Task Force on AIDS Prevention funded in part by the first million dollar Centers for Disease Control and Prevention grant.

Continuing to confront racism and homophobia, NABWMT established the Bush-Mallon Institute, offering workshops with trained facilitators to it's network of chapters, community organizations and Fortune 500 companies across the nation as well as published a supportive reference manual utilized for the program.

Throughout the nation, local chapters have participated in pantry drives, health fairs, Pride activities, eco activities and social interaction agendas determined by individual chapter members and leadership.

By it's nature and namesake, the organization over the decades has had it's detractors and espoused misconceptions concerning it's goals and motivations. As a revolutionary concept from it's inception, NABWMT has affirmed and demonstrated through it's enduring work, its commitment to a kaleidoscope of social justice issues rather than pandering to stereotypes or promoting a racist module of creating a group for people who prefer dating others based on their race or ethnicity.

The iconic legacy has set the tone for the future of the organization, while mandating that human rights messages continue to resonate in the 21st century.  


Part 2 in LifeLube tomorrow will detail information about the NA’s upcoming 30th Anniversary Convention called DIVERSE 2010, in Ft. Lauderdale, FL, July 26th - August 1st.  Click for more information about Chicago’s excellent chapter, Men of All Colors Together.

Keith Boykin to Speak About Justice for Gay Black Men - NEXT WEEK

What does justice look like for Black Gay Men? What is the role of allies?

Renowned television host, author and speaker Keith Boykin headlines the community forum “Justice for All?” to be held January 28, 2010 in Chicago.  The event will take place at the University Center, 525 South State on the second floor.

Doors will open at 6:00 p.m. for appetizers and socializing, and the program will begin promptly at 7:00 p.m.  Admission to the event is free.

Boykin and fellow panelists will address and debate the meaning of justice, past and current efforts to obtain equality, the role of allies, and strategies to bring real and lasting change for Black gay men. 

“It's not only important for Black gay men to be cognizant of how we are impacted by our lack of justice, but also, how we too, impact this innate right for others,” stated Boykin, who is affiliated with The Daily Voice, CNBC, and BET.  “Events like these continue to challenge and illuminate this fact."

Joining Boykin on the panel will be E. Patrick Johnson creator of “Sweet Tea: Black Gay Men of the South-An Oral History” and professor at Northwestern University, and Antonio D. Jimenez from the University of Illinois Chicago’s School of Public Health.   The forum will be hosted and moderated by Dr. Keith Magee (National Public Housing Museum) and Jim Pickett (AIDS Foundation of Chicago).

"Black gay men and their allies need to come together to have a real discussion about factors that threaten the wellness of our community," said Anthony Galloway of Test Positive Aware Network, one of the event organizers. "Although potentially controversial, we must explore what 'justice' is and how we can achieve it.  We are excited about the potential impact of this discussion."

A first-time collaboration between the Chicago Black Gay Men’s Caucus, the Communities of Color Collaborative, Project CRYSP and LifeLube.org has organized the forum to recognize Black History Month as well as National Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day (set for February 7, 2010).  Black gay men, gay men of all colors, and allies are encouraged to attend.

We've Trained the Media to Think We're Rich and White. That's a Problem

We've noted the perception of whiteness in the gay rights movement before. Some folks insist on making race part of the debate; others times, the evidence is irrefutable. And without a single leader, however, it's impossible to say our civil rights fight is led only by the light-skinned. But to anyone tuning in to the media's conversation on the issue, it might appear that way.

Read the rest at Queerty.

Atheism: Living Life Unfettered by Supernaturalism and Groupthink

Interview With Sikivu Hutchinson

via AlterNet by Greta Christina, Greta Christina's Blog

African-American atheist Sikivu Hutchinson calls on black atheists to play a critical role in the atheism movement.

What is it like to be a black atheist?

Obviously, I wouldn't know. But via Friendly Atheist, I recently read a piece by Sikivu Hutchinson for the L.A. Watts Times, titled 'Out of the Closet' -- Black Atheists. (A must-read, by the way.) Her piece focused on one side of this question -- being an atheist in the African American community. But I was curious about the other side: What is it like to be African American in the atheist community?

I don't think this is something atheists talk about enough. We're too willing to let our most prominent leaders and speakers mostly be white; we're critical of the negative effect religion has on communities of color, but we don't look very hard at why the atheist movement is so predominantly white, or what we could be doing to make our movement a safer place to land for people of color who are leaving religion.

So when I read Sikivu's piece, I thought she's be a good person to ask about this stuff. She was kind enough to give me an interview, and we spoke -- well, okay, emailed -- about privilege, the intersection of race and religion, the history of Christianity in African- American culture, what atheism has to contribute to society, and more. Here is that interview.

Greta Christina: In your piece for the L.A. Watts Times, you talked about being an atheist in the black community. Can you tell me a little about the flip side of that? What is it like to be a African- American in the atheist community? Have you encountered much racism? Have you found it to be pretty inclusive? Is it somewhere in between?

Sikivu Hutchinson: As it is with many prominent issues of ideological/ social relevance the assumption that white male thinkers and writers are the definitive spokespeople on atheism is highly problematic. I would like to see more atheists of color rise to prominence as theorists and scholars of record on atheist discourse, rather than the continued privileging of the usual "authorial" white suspects (i.e., Dawkins, Hitchens, Sam Harris).

GC: On that topic: There's often an assumption in political movements (I've seen it in the LGBT movement) that being inclusive of people of color simply means not being overtly and grossly racist. (As a queer woman, I've seen something similar, where people or organizations make subtle or not- so- subtle assumptions of heterosexuality, but they think they're not being homophobic because they're not hurling epithets or turning us away at the door.) Can you talk a little about that? What is the difference between being actively inclusive and welcoming of people of color... and simply not being overtly racist? And how does that play out in the atheist community?

SH: Oftentimes white folk engage with the issue of people of color and religious observance in a very paternalistic way -- musing about the "backwardness" of people of color, particularly African Americans, who subscribe to Christian and Muslim dogma despite their histories of colonialism, terrorism and slavery. Although religious observance among African Americans is paradoxical for these very reasons, the white critique of said world view is narrow and lacking in consciousness of the cultural context that informs black adoption of Judeo- Christian mores and values. Hence, the European- American atheist community can't be truly inclusive unless there is some recognition of how privilege and positionality undergird the very articulation of atheism as an ideological space that empowers white folk to deconstruct the cultural tethers of organized religion, without having their authorial right to do so be questioned.

Read the rest.

I'm not talking no gay and lesbian reform, I'm talking revolution

lorenzo hererra y lozano shares this raw, hardly edited work in progress with lifelube

It is no secret to anyone, friends or not, that I’m not down with most things about the Gay and Lesbian Movement. In fact, I make it a point to call it a Gay and Lesbian Movement, rather than queer, LGBT, LGBTI, LGBTTISGLTS, and so on, because it isn’t any of those. As a movement, our identities, our experiences, our realities and our very bodies are summed up in letters/acronyms and just as easily chopped of when the opportunity presents itself. Incremental gains, after all, is a pretty way of saying “Not you, not now, not ever.”

By now I’ve made a good name for myself as being angry and perpetually unhappy with anything. I’d like to think I bring my critiques to the table along with some potential suggestions (however vague and useless) and maybe even some solutions (however equally vague and useless.. and irrelevant). This morning, however, I realized that for too long I’ve been focusing on the details, the little things, the nuances, the ego really.

So in the way Oprah taught me to say “AHA!” (then run out and drive a Ford Focus), I came to this place this morning (I drove there in the Focus):

The Gay and Lesbian Movement has gone too far, too many times and is fundamentally flawed institutionally and (to quote Micaela Díaz-Sánchez, though in a different context) “by design.” I’ve spent almost a decade kicking and screaming about the exclusion of people of color and the consistently offensive nature of our random and haphazard inclusion. We cant reform this, we must flip it on its head.

It is no secret, no mystery and no surprise that communities of color have a lot of work to do when it comes to homophobia. But, homophobia is not ours alone, nor have we mastered the art of all things homophobic, in fact, so much of who we are and what we put out in the world is inherently anti-homophobic (so stop using machismo with us!). Again, homophobia exists in our homes, yes, but let us also think about the connections Suzanne Pharr made in Homophobia: A Weapon of Sexism (Women’s Project, 1997 – though it originally came out in the 80’s), about how homophobia is in fact a weapon, a tool of sexism and is fundamentally about misogyny, the hatred of the feminine.

When we talk about uprooting homophobia, let us dig deeper and think about what it would mean to uproot misogyny. Perhaps gay and bi cisgender men would then see the inherit connections between our rights and a woman’s right to choose. And, let us not talk about these isms and phobias in contexts that imply people of color hold the trademark on evil.

This isn’t about homophobia alone, however, it is about the more profound dilemma of the Gay and Lesbian Movement’s apparently inherent inability to entertain or fathom the complexities of our realities. We do not need ANOTHER survey, poll or focus group process. We are not that THAT complicated and hard to crack open. We could learn a lot by just looking at what people of color have been screaming about for the past say, 20-30-40-500 years?

The Gay and Lesbian Movement has done too much harm far too many times. From the trans-exclusion in ENDA to the white supremacist attacks on people of color (many of whom queer, many of which by queer/people of color) post-Prop 8 passing. From the ridiculous and insulting minimalist funding of our organizations to the overtly outrageous and idiotic overbearing almost white-only leadership of what could be multi-racial organizations, but instead are really white organizations with some people of color (some of which might know they are people of color) sprinkled in their diversity departments.

I mean no disrespect to the people of color working in these organizations, those working to change these organizations, and to the race-conscious and downass white people who have had our backs even when we might have not known or be able to have our own backs. This is not about individuals, this is about institution, structure, underlying values and subsequent actions.

There is no turning back, there is no reforming, there is only revolutionizing. It is not enough to bring affirmative action ‘a la Pipeline Project and pour more people of color (who, by the way, might only be trained on how to behave in front of white people and people of color who know no better or know better but act like they don’t) into these potentially multi-racial but really, white organizations. My liberation is not tied to brown men in philanthropy, my liberation is tied to movement, actual flowing-moving forward-thinking and shaking movement. Affirmative action is not good enough and might even work against us.

Advisory boards are not enough, diversity committees were never enough and slapping a black face on a billboard.. not enough. These acts, if anything, are only further indication of how far off track we are from bringing about real, comprehensive, revolutionary, life-saving, world-spinning change. We’ve tried these things over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. They haven't worked. They have only scarred us deeper.

I’m not talking no gay and lesbian reform, I’m talking revolution. I’m not even talking revolution out into the world, I’m talking about internal and internalized slamming the door on old, tired, useless, racist, classist, and sexist ways. I’m talking about opening the door to another possibility, another reality.

The damage is to wide, the wounds are too deep, the tears are too sharp for us to settle for more of the same. Because of the scarcity of our realities, I could only think of radical and perhaps extreme measures. The balance is so far off that perhaps only by going in the complete opposite direction can we begin to talk about finding middle ground.

Here are just a few, off the cuff, not unique and not comprehensively thought-out ideas:

Leadership: Bring on the radical, the poor, the working class, the woman, the trans, the young, the elder and roll up into positions of power. I aint talking no director of diversity or outreach, I’m talking administrative, foundational, hierarchical leadership power. Add in some mad, mad, MAD skills to get this job done and some good, healthy, healing and loving support systems to facilitate the journey. Add in insanely and irrationally high expectations that these leaders of color hold and embody a radical racial justice analysis. People of color spewing the same thing we’ve tried to run away from, is not what we need. We need only look at the RNC.

Values: Let us test every single one of our assumptions and throw out the ones that make no sense. No more honoring of elected officials because they say they want to support us in getting married, while simultaneously establishing poverty courts and pushing people out of their cities. No more celebrating the ringing of Wall Street bells when Wall Street thrives off the decimation of people’s homes and bodies globally and here in our homes. It’s time for some overt, explicit, unapologetic, proactive and rooted values.

Issues: Let us finally have that damn conversation about marriage. Is it relevant or not? Is it our fight or not? Do we really want it or not? If we do, let’s do this, but let us just have that conversation once and for all. Let us challenge our ability to think beyond the confines of what we believe are the limits of our desire. Let us think of how the opening of the borders is a queer issue, let us challenge gay and lesbian gentrification of poor and working class neighborhoods. Let us figure some shit out.

Priorities: Let us flip this baby on its head. If we must prioritize, let us put our poor and working class young trans folk of color at the top, with even brown cisgender queer men at the bottom, just above white men. Let us really fundamentally transform and transgress the meaning of priorities. For someone’s god’s sake, let us fucking think.

Bipartisanship: I’m over hearing about reaching across the aisle. I’m not interested in finding compromise with people who believe I might be able to wed my partner but my grandmother living with dementia cannot receive adequate and efficient health care. No more. My grandmother is not a negotiating tool, nor is my love for my man. I’m in favor of full-on in your face partisanship. I’m ready to live in a world of crazy commie socialist tree-hugging vegan-wearing lefties. I’m not looking for (nor interested) in a world where we all agree and think the same, but I am looking for a world where certain values are unwavering and non-negotiable. We can argue on strategy all we want, but the fundamentals, no.

Anti-Bias: My ass is biased, period. I believe trans folk have a basic right to receive proper and good health care, period. I don’t want to have conversations about fiscal conservatives or pragmatic approaches. No, I’m biased, I view the world through a biased lens that says all life is sacred and all bodies are sacred, period. Let us start testing our biases, own them and check ourselves and each other when our biases are fed by isms and phobias instead of love and liberation.

Organizations: Let us survey our worlds and name those of us who are still around. Where are our organizations? Which ones are still here? Which ones did we have to close? Why? Let us go out into the wildernesses of our own fears and organizing heartbreaks and find the hearts and minds of those of us no longer around. Let us re-think what is possible and necessary for us to thrive. If it is through organizations or a combination thereof, let it be. But let us make it happen in healthy, affirming, thriving and sustainable ways. Enough of weekly cash flow scares (for the lucky ones) and enough of philanthropic prescription (for the questionable luckier ones). This is our movement, let us make some sense of it.

Organizing: Let us check ourselves and our assumptions on what is feasible, doable and legitimate. A structured, registered, well-funded organization stands in no way above rank of grass roots, campus-based, workspace-based, home-based volunteer-run, budget-less organizing. Perhaps a comprehensive approach to organizing is needed to bring about the lasting and sustainable change we need. Let us then begin honoring all forms of organizing.

Academia: Enough of academics living in their own planets, going to their own conferences and writing their papers “about” people who look like them, but people they don’t always get to be near, around, or loved and fed by. This isn't a jab at academic sisterhood who are doing mad good work breaking shit down and helping us make sense of our worlds. This is a slap at institutions that do not support genuine relationship building and nurturing. But, too, if you’re in school reading, writing and getting grades about and because of queer xicana performance artists, your ass better be showing up to their performances and throwing down some substantive and tangible love.

Arts: Let us get some artists up in this, now. I recall being interviewed by the Washington Blade and asked how I felt identifying as an artist/writer while still being a “leader.” I remember laughing, not at the irony, but at the idea that anyone would not see the connection or inherent nature of the arts and their place in our movements for centuries. Let us begin honoring our artists, not only in word and by applause, but by tearing open our pockets and supporting our artists in doing their thing, which is our thing, and advancing our place in this world.

[Let me be clear, these ideas are not ranked in any particular order. While my brain is un-linear, Facebook, email and Blogger are.]

I have spent the last several years lamenting the bridges I burned. I often go through life wondering what bridge I burn with each step I take, each word I type. Then, on occasion, I look around and realize there never was a bridge to begin with. All this time I have been standing in the high current with water up to my neck. And really, the current is where the movement is. We need no bridge, we need only jump in the river and storm through.

Come. Swim.

[read more from lorenzo here]

NEW on LifeLube - race-based sexual stereotyping paper

LifeLube recommends:



"Race-Based Sexual Stereotyping and Sexual Partnering Among Men Who Use the Internet to Identify Other Men for Bareback Sex"

You can find it in the Sex and Drugs section of the Mothership (with lots of other great stuff.)

Scroll about half-way and voila - there it is. A fascinating read.

Shooting the Elephant

by Charles Stephens

Read more from Charles on LifeLube

First, let me clear the air, I really hated the film Crash. I found it disgustingly sentimental. Contrived and absolutely overindulgent in it’s political correctness. It was one of those movies that sought to dispel stereotypes, and yet managed to reinforce the most simplistic notions of race since Driving Miss Daisy. It also reminds me of why I cringe at discussions of race in general. It was ultimately a movie to make politically correct white people, and people of color that are thrilled by any acknowledgement of racism, feel good. Even if it’s still racism, just with lipstick on it.

It’s funny to me how awkward discussions about race can be, even among the enlightened, even in 2008, even among the Gay Men’s Healthitocracy. Like the film Crash, this leads to a superficiality in the conversation, one that limits the possibilities of how we can think about, and interact around our racial differences. In conversations about race, we are far too reliant on creating victims and villains, roles that lack the categorical complexity to address the nuanced roles we play.

White people, especially of the liberal variety, are usually terrified of saying something racially offensive. This makes for superficial conversations at best, or self-righteous posturing at worst. They are afraid of being accused of racism. This unfortunately arrests any capacity to have meaningful dialogue and strips away the honesty.

And then there are approaches to race that I’ve witnessed, especially in progressive movements. There is the “I don’t see race, everyone is human” approach. The problem with this model is that it attempts to ignore the impact race had and continues to have. Just because you put a bag over your head, or cover your faces, or close your eyes, doesn’t mean something ceases to exist. Further, we are all exposed to and socialized around notions of racial difference and racial hierarchy. Saying you don’t see race, also suggests you don’t see racism, your own or someone else’s.

There is, within racial discourse, the chronically appalled model. One keeps score in the discussion or meeting of the various racial offenses. For some white people, this provides them the opportunity to “out anti-racist” each other, creating a hierarchy not of race, but of anti-racism. They each compete to show the others how much they “get it.” And before you know it, after the score has been tallied, the meeting turns into a support group.

There is the “I am too evolved to be a racist,” approach. Humor, or an attempt at it, is the key ingredient of this model. The best example of this model in pop culture is Sarah Silverman. Meaningful dialogue is substituted with provocation, and if you don’t “get it,” then you don’t have a sense of humor. And though humor is useful, and satire can be illuminating, every time one acts out or reinforces racial stereotypes, doesn’t mean they are shattering some taboo, and isn’t always funny.

What I would propose is rather than seeing race as something to transcend, wallow in, or make light of, we should seek to acknowledge racial difference without reinforcing racial hierarchy. At best this is done by recognizing racial difference and rejecting racial mythology. Insisting upon racial complexity rather than falling into notions of what constitutes good or bad versions of racial representation. Institutional discrimination is contrary to democracy and must be banned. Whiteness has to be talked about and called attention to, so it’s not seen as a standard, a universal, where everything else is a deviation. As gay men in particular, we must vigorously seek out ways to grapple with racial difference, be it erotically, politically, or socially. We also might have to invent models from failed past ones in our movement, models that have worked for other movements, and dare to imagine new ones.

Charles Stephens is an Atlanta-based writer and organizer. Check out his blog.

Straight on Prop 8

Today, Chicago's very own Reverend Charles Straight

analyzes the Prop 8 fallout with our favorite podcasters.

Myth of the Black-gay divide

IN THE wake of Barack Obama's historic victory, a false and reactionary narrative has emerged that blames Black voters for the gay marriage ban that passed by a 52 to 48 percent margin in California.

While Florida and Arizona also passed same-sex marriage bans, the vote for Prop 8 in the politically progressive state of California is widely attributed to the enormous surge of Black voters, 70 percent of whom approved the ban reversing the state's May 2008 Supreme Court decision allowing lesbians and gays to marry. The exit polls showed that 53 percent of Latinos voted for the ban, as well as around 49 percent of white voters.

The state's Black population is 6.2 percent, and it accounted for 10 percent of the overall vote. In other words, blaming African Americans for the referendum's passage ignores 90 percent of the vote.

It also ignores recent history. To judge from social research, had there been an unapologetically pro-civil rights campaign, there was the prospect of a different outcome.

The most comprehensive study of Black attitudes toward homosexuality, which combines 31 national surveys from 1973 to 2000, came to a fascinating conclusion. Georgia State University researchers found that "Blacks appear to be more likely than whites both to see homosexuality as wrong and to favor gay-rights laws."

African Americans' religiosity leads many to believe that homosexuality is a sin, while their own experience of oppression leads them to oppose discrimination. This was borne out in the 2004 elections, where, in the six states with substantial Black populations that had same-sex marriage bans on their ballots, Blacks were slightly less likely than whites to vote for them.

Nationally, 58 percent now oppose gay marriage bans, a dramatic shift from just a few years ago. If an explicit case in favor of gay marriage were made by activists, a multiracial majority could be won over in coming years.

Read the rest on SocialistWorker.org.

Exotic

...“exotic” cannot be a permanent quality of any object. In order to enjoy the exotic, we must keep it at a distance. As soon as we possess it, it becomes familiar...

by Shinen Wong, via Fridae


In University, I fell in love with a boy whose name is S. I was 21, and he was 19. I was in my third year of university, just one year short of graduation, whereas he had just matriculated, fresh out of high school, nervous and excited, a gorgeous mess of a character. He was scruffy, lightly bearded on his boyish face, with short sugary-brown hair gently tousled on his head. He was Caucasian, with a lean, tight-framed, slightly lanky body. He stood about half an inch or so taller than I, about 1.27 centimetres in metric, something he and I had joked about once, foreshadowing our insurmountable differences.

I remember seeing him during our first Gay-Straight Alliance meeting that year, and catching glimpse of his adorable features peeking out from behind the girl he was standing behind. He and I never made eye contact that night, he had a nervous timidity that meant he scurried away from the meeting as soon as it was over, and before I had had the chance to introduce myself. I could not stop thinking about him. I had felt my heart race like it had not for so long. I knew that I had to speak to him, the boy with the tuft of scruff under his chin, and the earrings that connoted: maybe he was a bad boy.

Read the rest.

Poor and Gay Aren't Mutually Exclusive Categories

By Diana Scholl

Housing Works

When it comes to addressing HIV and AIDS among gay men, there are a host of policy positions that need to be changed to create equality for gay men and men who have sex with men of all races . For example, we need to have comprehensive sexual health and awareness education which includes HIV prevention and treatment education both for students and those not currently in school HIV prevention education that teaches about safer sex for everyone — gay, straight and everything in-between-- in an open and accurate way. And there’s no way for us to have an effective National AIDS Strategy without acknowledging that all levels of government must do all that they can to end discrimination on the basis of who we have sex with.

But it’s impossible to demand that government address HIV among gay men without also demanding a critical examination of race and poverty.

A few not-so-fun facts:

• A black gay man is much more likely to get infected with HIV than a white gay man even if they’re both engaged in the same amount of “risky behavior”

• Black and Latino gay men are more likely to be diagnosed with AIDS and HIV concurrently and less likely to receive lifesaving antiretrovirals and continuing care than his white counterpart.

• 25 percent of gay teenagers are kicked out of their homes and become homeless, making them more likely to become infected with HIV than their non-homeless counterparts.

As Charles King said in a speech on World AIDS Day last year, “The reality is that AIDS is no longer so much a gay disease in the United States as it is a disease of race and poverty. And that brings to light a dirty secret about the organized and politically engaged gay community - that we are overwhelmingly white and reasonably well-off, and our movement is almost exclusively about rights for ourselves and people like us.”

To address both the needs of gay men and of everyone, we need targeted case management and housing to address as both prevention and health care measures. We need to implement targeted campaigns for prevention and getting people into care. We need the government to sponsor media campaigns that can’t be ignored. And of course, we need universal health care so no one falls through the cracks.

But above all, we must combat stigma and discrimination to get at the root of those problems that the government alone cannot solve.

The CDC’s rise in reported infections shows that 45 percent of new infections were among blacks, and 53 percent were among men who have sex with men (MSM). And too often we talk about AIDS as a disease affecting “black people” and “gay people” as though these are always mutually exclusive categories. But 63 percent of new infections among blacks occurred among men who have sex with men, most of them young men.

It’s impossible to talk about HIV and AIDS without talking about the intersection of race, gender, poverty and a litany of other issues, and it is important that the AIDS community and the gay community address these issues head on.

[Click here to read previous input into the 2009 Gay Men's Health Agenda. Please feel free to comment there - or you could send in a full post of your own here. We will be happy to publish it! The feedback we receive will be featured in the closing plenary of the upcoming National Gay Men's Health Summit and will be a means of moving the community forward in the new year around issues that are important to all of us.]

Study: LGBTs, Race and Mental Health

According to a study conducted at Columbia University's Mailman School of Public Health among lesbian, gay, and bisexual populations, blacks and Latinos do not have more mental disorders than whites. Based on the theory that stress related to prejudice would increase risk for mental disorders, researchers typically expect that black lesbians, gay men, and bisexuals face prejudice related to both racism and homophobia and therefore would have more disorders than their white counterparts. Contrary to this expectation, however, the Mailman School study found that black lesbians, gay men, and bisexuals had significantly fewer disorders than white individuals. Latinos had a prevalence of disorders similar to whites. The findings will be reported in the November 2007 American Journal of Public Health.

"These findings suggest that black lesbians, gay men, and bisexuals have effective ways to cope with prejudice related to racism and homophobia" noted Ilan H. Meyer, PhD, associate professor of clinical Sociomedical Sciences at the Mailman School of Public Health and principal investigator of the study.

The study of 388 white, black and Latino New York City residents aged 18 – 59 who identified themselves as lesbian, gay, or bisexual is the first population-based study of its kind to examine the prevalence of mental disorders among black and Latino, versus white, lesbians, gay men, and bisexual individuals.

By contrast to the findings about mental disorders, more black and Latino gay men, lesbians, and bisexuals than whites reported a history of serious suicide attempts.

"Because these suicide attempts occurred at an early age, typically during the teenage, we can speculate that they coincided with a coming-out period and were related to the social disapprobation afforded to lesbian, gay, and bisexual identities," Dr. Meyer said.

The findings were consistent with the notion that these problems may be more potent among lesbians, gay men, and bisexual youth in Latino and other communities of color. "In the absence of higher prevalence of mood disorders in this population, these findings pose challenge to mental health professionals" said Dr. Meyer. "If this is indeed the case, public health professionals should address what prevention efforts are required to reduce suicide risk among lesbian, gay, and bisexual youths in these communities" Dr. Meyer said.

The study also found that, across all race/ethnic groups, younger cohorts of lesbians, gay men, and bisexuals (those in age groups 18 – 29 and 30 – 44 as compared with 45 – 59 years old) had lower prevalence of almost all mental disorders categories, and the difference was statistically significant for mood disorders. Younger cohorts also had fewer serious suicide attempts than did older cohorts (but this was statistically significant only for the middle cohort).

"The finding regarding younger cohorts of lesbians, gay men, and bisexuals is consistent with social stress theories that predicted that the liberalization of social attitudes toward homosexuality over the past few decades can lead to a decline in stress and related mental disorders and suicide among lesbians, gay men, and bisexual individuals" said Dr. Meyer.

In other findings, the study reported that bisexual identity was related to higher prevalence of substance use disorders but not of anxiety or mood disorders and it confirmed previous observations that among gay populations, men and women do not differ substantially in disorder prevalence.

The study was funded by the National Institute of Mental Health.

About the Mailman School of Public Health

The only accredited school of public health in New York City, and among the first in the nation, Columbia University's Mailman School of Public Health provides instruction and research opportunities to more than 950 graduate students in pursuit of masters and doctoral degrees. Its students and more than 300 multi-disciplinary faculty engage in research and service in the city, nation, and around the world, concentrating on biostatistics, environmental health sciences, epidemiology, health policy and management, population and family health, and sociomedical sciences. www.mailman.hs.columbia.edu.

a world without plantations

by Lorenzo Herrera y Lozano

Earlier this week a person sent an e-mail through the Gay Men’s Health Summit listserve about a posting on Chicago’s Craigslist Rants & Raves section. The posting was about racism in the gay community and called for organizations to take action in addressing the issue. The e-mail implied that racism was more prevalent in the gay community, which was later addressed in an e-mail response by another member of the list serve. Finally, another member sent an e-mail inviting the group to look at homophobia in “… white, black, brown, yellow, green, blue and red cultures.” Below is a response:

Call me ignorant, but I thought yellow and red were inappropriate terms in referring to Asian and Native communities. I do not know what green and blue cultures are, but I will assume the terms are not used to dismiss the importance of identity. As a Chicano, I take the term brown rather seriously and would hope it would be respected as such among my colleagues.

In any event, I’d like to take a step back and not assume that a conversation on racism in our communities can be resolved in one or two e-mails. I agree on the previous posting that racism is not unique to Same Gender Loving, Queer, Two Spirit, Transgender, Intersex, Bi, Lesbian, Gay, otherwise-identified and non-identifying communities.

Similarly, I do not think that people of color are more homophobic than white people. Interestingly, I have not seen this notion challenged as much outside of communities of color. Perhaps an opportunity to look at the deep seeded racism that allows this thought to thrive.

I would invite us to challenge our internalized needs to defend our privilege by jumping so quickly into ways ‘others’ oppress us. I do not mean to dismiss the fact that there is homophobia in communities of color. I have certainly had my share of homophobia within my own community and do not intend to point fingers at the homophobia of other communities while my own is running rampant.

There is no accident in the way people of color have been strategically, institutionally and historically marginalized from participating in the civic process of this country. Sadly, mainstream (and I use this term loosely) LGBT organizations also have much room to grow in their efforts to include all of us as well. I do not think this exclusion is necessarily strategic, but certainly institutional and historic. A diversity committee on the board of a national organization does not constitute inclusivity. Hiring a person of color to deal with all people of color ‘matters’ is not inclusivity. Until we see a shift in a rigid white-middle class-gay male-dominant paradigm, people of color will continue to be left on the side of the road. Having a movement large enough to fit us all means that the agenda must be shared. I do not believe the agenda must be agreed on entirely, but there must be enough room for all of us to be engaged on our own terms.

People of color are expected to assimilate or at least acculturate into a white society. We are expected to learn the language, rid ourselves of our accents, learn when to be quiet, and swallow inappropriate behavior toward us. Whereas non-people of color are expected to be “culturally sensitive” and “tolerant.”

I am not interested in a world where these expectations and roles are inverted. I am, however, interested in a world where neither are expected and we grow the courage to deal with what is really going on, instead of dancing on the outskirts of the problem. I see us benefiting more from figuring out ways to coalesce. We have tried pointing fingers at each other with minimal results. After decades of experience, this movement remains in the dark ages. The time to become culturally sensitive is over. It is time for us to deal with the core that continues to emanate illnesses, such as racism, homophobia, transphobia, classism, sexism, lesbophobia, aidsphobia, xenophobia and so many other phobias and isms that permeate the air we breathe and share.

Only together can we overcome the barriers that have been placed before us. Marriage discrimination (to provide an example) will be difficultly overcome if we keep reinforcing conservative’s messaging that this is a white middle class gay male issue, by following white middle class gay male-exclusive agendas. I do not ask that we disregard this part of our community, but ask that this part of our community work with the rest of us to create a movement large enough to fit us all, whole.

I do not dream of a world where people of color own the plantations. I dream of a world where plantations do not exist.

Paz,


Lorenzo Herrera y Lozano

Lorenzo Herrera y Lozano is a Queer Xicano Poet, Dreamer and Activist, born in San José, California, raised in Estación Adela, Chihuahua, and now living in Austin, Tejas. Lorenzo’s work has been called “uncompromising and hopeful, cínico y cariñoso,” “inspiring… provocative,” “landing so deep/you bleed without feeling the cut.” He is the author of the Lambda Literary Award-Nominated Santo de la Pata Alzada: Poems from the Queer/Xicano/Positive Pen. Further information is available on jotopower.com and godisbrown.blogspot.com

Black Beyond Boundaries in Philly last Friday

Last Friday at the LGBTI Health Summit in Philadelphia, the morning plenary was titled "Black Beyond Boundaries" and was really exceptional --- every speaker, including the Mayor of Philadelphia was powerful and moving. There was also an incredible performance piece by Zane Booker's Smoke, Lilllies and Jade Arts Initiative. The cream on top of the frosting on top of the cake came via a fabulous speech delivered by Mark McLaurin, the ED of the New York State Black Gay Network. As he has done before, Mark TOTALLY ROCKED the house. Thanks to to him for sharing his speech with LifeLube, printed in its entirety below and worth every second it takes.

Jim

--------------------------

By Mark McLaurin

Good Morning !!!! First I want to take this opportunity to thank the organizers of the LGBTI Health Summit for making it possible for me to be here- and more importantly- for making the critical decision that a conversation about the health and about the lives of black lgbtq folkz was a topic worthy of a plenary. I was in Cambridge and let me just say………….We are CERTAINLY moving in the right direction. Let me also say that as the Executive Director of the New York State Black Gay Network, the ONLY statewide membership based advocacy organization devoted to a for and the betterment of the lives of black gay men in the entire United States, my talk will unapologetically focus on the needs of black gay men, Others can, should and will talk about the L B T Q members of the black community- I say this because its important, in my view, to always delineate and demarcate on whose behalf and by whose authority you are selected to speak. As a black gay man I find that as I mature as an activist, my moments of outrage are so much less about my explicit exclusion and so much more about my implicit inclusion and so I endeavor, when I speak, NEVER to piss my ownself off- if that makes sense !

That being said………the organizers have asked me to speak about the general state of health among black gay men, touch on the topic of health disparities, outline the need for additional resources and for really substantive collaboration- and end with a charge to the audience, all in the space of 15 minutes.........PAUSSSSSSE………..We shall see !

I must confess that it is a bittersweet moment to be a black gay advocate. On the one hand, there are many promising signs and harbingers and then there is the fact that just a couple of weeks ago- a community gathered to bury a 25 year old black gay man who died from complications of HIV/AIDS- At the end He had CMV and PCP and virtually every other opportunistic infection known to man. Its important to me that you know that this community did not gather in Burundi or Botswana but in Brooklyn, New York. This was not a young man without information of support, He had been a peer educator and worked for one of the larger AIDS Service organizations in the City. This was not a young man who had been exposed perinatally or did not have access to the latest pharmacological interventions to help him in his battle to stay alive- He died ON The ADAP program and literally in the shadow of one of the largest HIV/AIDS research institutions in the world. It is at times like those, as a shell shocked community gathered to comfort and support each other that I began to wonder where had WE failed him ? While on others, we were calling how, exactly, was it- that we passed him by ? If he TAUGHT the information and had access to the services- why couldn’t we save him and since we couldn’t, WHAT, in Gods name did that mean for all the other much less connected kids and what REAL chance did they have ? I struggled with those questions until Friday night here in Philadelphia when I ran into a young man that is here at this conference. I wont point him out and embarrass him but this very conference gave him the opportunity to be reunited with someone who provided services to him as a young person and as we sat and COCKTAILED at WOODYS………….Yeah- I had a few but I KNOW what I heard- He turned to this colleague of mine and plaintively declared that ‘HAD IT NOT BEEN FOR YOU- I WOULD BE DEAD SOMEWHERE IN THE HUDSON RIVER”- I was looking in his eyes when he said it and I didn’t find it to be hyperbole- THAT is how serious it is out here and so I had to check MYSELF. Who the HELL was I to get tired or to question the efforts- After all- Im 33, college educated, come from a loving, accepting family who were able to give me just about any material comfort I could want growing up (and still do). I have never accessed a single youth or HIV related service, I have never performed a single HIV intervention, never had to tell a person they were HIV positive, never counseled ANYONE about ANYTHING- with the possible exception of my good judys about their latest adventure in serial monogamy- In the end- Im a policy wonk and an advocate and I resolved then and there to shut up and wonk and get the hell over myself and advocate- and so here I am !

One wouldn’t know it from perusing the pages of Ebony, or the New York Times or…..THE ADVOCATE. One could remain completely unaware in the midst of a gander at the websites of the NAACP, or People for the American Way or even……….the Human Rights Campaign…….but Black Gay Men are in real trouble, on a variety of fronts. Young black gay men continue to experience higher rates of incarceration, report a greater number of and longer periods of being homeless and report higher rates of depression than similarly situated adolescents and young adults among any other population. It’s a miracle that we know this given the appalling dearth of research being done among this population but I assure you, ‘Tis true. Service providers in my coalition from Bed-Stuy to Buffalo from Red Hook to Rochester continue to report an ever increasing need on the part of young people for an ever increasing number of services to address an ever more complex set of presenting issues in their lives. All of this need is occurring in a static governmental funding environment that rarely increases in dollars and NEVER expands the kinds of services it will support- All of which spell disaster for young people.

You may not have known it from watching last week’s star studded Centers for Disease Control roll out of the new “AFRICAN AMERICAN HIV INITIATIVE” in Atlanta, GA. You would not have heard it from the Nancy Wilson or Usher or any of the other super stars that were invited to “summit” on the state of HIV/AIDS in the black community last week- but the black community passed an alarmingly foreboding milestone the day before. For the first time, since surveillance has begun on the HIV/AIDS epidemic, black MSM have now overtaken all other risk categories as the lead risk category for black men, overall. While this has LONG been true of men in virtually every other racial/ethnic group since the beginning of the epidemic, the fact that it is now true for black men CAN, MUST and WILL represent a real sea change in the way the larger black community talks about HIV/AIDS in its midst- some good and some bad- and we must be ready for both.

The old adage is that when America catches a cold, black folkz get pneumonia. Given the disparate impact of a whole host of health conditions on black men, there can be little question that that is true. Black gay men, however, as a result of the homophobia of the black community and the racism in the mainstream gay community, unlike straight men, often do not have a figurative “home” in which to climb under a blanket and drink some chicken noodle soup and ride out the storm. Witness- if an ostensibly straight black little boy in rural Alabama gets called a “nigger” at school- still an all too frequent occurrence (and certainly not just in Alabama) he can go home where his community will embrace and support him. His parents will tell him that its just ignorance and its no reflection on his own inherent worth and he very likely will attend church on Sunday where his Pastor will tell him that he was fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of his God and that will give him sustenance and comfort for the next time………but what if hes gay and gets called a faggot ? (an all too often occurrence). Its VERY unlikely that he can go home and share this with his mother, lest he raise her suspicions or even if he does and she is understanding, its even more unlikely she will feel comfortable sharing it with his father- who is even less likely to understand and even if they do deal with it as a family unit- They STILL probably belong to a church where the Pastor sees him as some alien abomination wholly outside the vision of God and hence the protection of the community and so………..he sits silent. But maybe as he grows older he wants to get the hell out of Alabama and live his life and be who he is- but WHERE- Is he genuinely welcomed and treated as an equal in the Castro or Chelsea or even Montrose in Houston- or does the community there either ogle or objectify or completely ignore or marginalize- depending on his physicality ???

Is there a gay community center where he is comfortable in his southern,black skin- Is there a “QUEER” youth group where he can be who he is (AND MEMO TO YOU- ITS PROBABLY NOT “QUEEEEEEER”)- Im thinking not. It is THIS boy for whom we must find a way.

In the midst of all of this- even in the HIV/AIDS and LGBT arenas- black gay men continue to be marginalized. Black Gay Men, when considered at all in the context of HIV/AIDS are only considered in the context of the extent to which they represent a “bridge” to HIV transmission in black women. This only contributes to the feeling of being silenced. Who wants to be the one that gave the mythical “DL” brother the “bug” that he passed onto the church going woman- Me, personally, ID RATHER BEEEE THE DL BROTHER- Do you see how this works ???

But the LGBT movement is, quite frankly little better- When the LGBT Health movement expresses a desire to MOVE ON from HIV/AIDS-that’s fine- but you better know who you are moving on from- When the Gay and Lesbian Medical Association holds conferences in Miami resort hotels and has two or three work shops on PODIATRY (its apparently terrrrribly taxing on feet to party all night and walk on hot sand all summer) and NEAR silence on HIV/AIDS- you better know what that means for my comfort level in being part of a coalition.

My fear, however, is that I have painted an overly grim picture of the lives of black gay men. It is not so- When the final history is written- the record will reflect incredible innovation and awe inspiring determination and a whole lotta joy- allll in the face of unspeakable tragedy. We have not, by and large, been defined by or even had much time to notice what we did not have- we have been too busy building an alternative structure. We didn’t have, often times, culturally competent shelters for black gay youth- so we invented the House and ballroom community. We did not have- for the most part- ASOs that understood the unique HIV prevention needs of black gay men so we built agencies like COLOURS and MOCHA and POCC out of our living rooms. We didn’t have- in most instances- bars and clubs that were particularly inviting to us or played music that we liked so we had house parties. We did not have- in far too many instances, people to take care of us as we grew sick and died and we created our own network of helping hands. These are things that you must know about us if we are to work in coalition together.

Don’t get me wrong, I sense, on the part of many activists in this movement, an earnest desire to build a formidable and just movement among LGBTQ people, I would not be here if I did not- but we cant get there from here without a really good understanding of some of the ground rules. I have to say that your inclusion of the PBGMLC as a part of this conference and as lead organizer of this plenary speaks loudly and clearly about the bright prospects for the future. We really do have so much more in common than separates us- and, in my view, we genuinely cant be successful without each other. There are actually far more rules for engagement than I have time to speak about today- but herez just a couple.


A- Let us take the lead on confronting the latest anti gay absurdity from the latest jack leg African American preacher the media decides to focus on. It makes many of us viscerally uncomfortable when activists who don’t look like us aggressively attack someone many in our community of origin, would consider a leader. There is a role for you to play, Help our nascent organizations get the word out, Help pitch friendly media onto doing a story on those of us on the ground, As a concession Ill even let you call this posture of ours internalized homophobia under your breath but let us take the lead.

B- Work WITH us on prioritizing the agenda- Understand that as important as all of the issues are- black gay men are not going to come to the table with an agenda that emphasizes Gay Marriage of DP benefits over HIV/AIDS- Understand the fact that, by and large, black gay men are not as “OVER THE TOP OUTRAGED” by instances of discrimination in the workplace or the public square because, quite frankly, we have grown a bit used to it- Don’t interpret that as us caring less, it just gets expressed differently.

C- Don’t demand that we fit into the larger community’s closeted versus “out” either or set up. “Coming Out” is not always something that black gay men can relate to- Many of us go IN and OUT of the closet depending on the mood, our surroundings, the context or even the weather- It doesn’t mean that our instances of not being OUT necessarily equal instances of being CLOSETED- or that my instances of not being vocal stem from a deep seated internalized oppression paradigm the community always seems to have at the ready- sometimes its just not wanting to wear that particular hat that particular day. The burgeoning growth of the black gay pride movements puts the lie to the notion that we are any less comfortable in our own skin- it is imperative that it be understood that we can, must, should and WILL be allowed to DO IT OUR WAY !

Im going to close here - I promised fifteen minutes and I want to hold to our promise but I want to thank all of you again for being such a patient audience and the organizers of this conference for having us here- I want you to know that Im leaving this place with a much greater sense of optimism about the future of the movement and a much greater determination to stick in there and do the hard work that needs to be done to create a progressive movement to sweep across this Country and make us ALL better. I believe it was Ben Franklin who said that “We must all hang together or we will most assuredly hang separately” and so it is !

Thank you and God Bless !