The BEST of Lifelube - "How is Sanford Gaylord healthy?" From Wednesday, October 6, 2010

How is Sanford Gaylord healthy?

One of the best things that I have done in keeping healthy is to realize that I am a work in progress; maintaining my health and staying healthy is an ongoing process.

How am I healthy? That is a good question. I think realizing that I was not healthy for awhile and deciding to set goals and take the steps to be a healthier person is one of the best things I could have done for myself. As they say, “acceptance is the first step.”

I have learned, that it is easy to fall into a rut and isolate, so that means turning off the computer, picking up the phone and talking instead of texting. I try to see friends and family in person and find things to do outside of the house as much as possible.

I also try to find the joy in life and laugh as much as possible. Finding joy keeps me healthy mentally. The arts have always brought me joy. As an actor and I recently was able to perform again after a long hiatus and am lining up future engagements.

Being a “grown up” is not easy; it is full of stress. I try to find some form of physical activity to deal with stress instead of my vices. I take walks and ride my bike to the park or the lakefront path. When I drive, I park a few blocks away from to my destination. I have learned to use portion control and moderation when it comes to food and vices.

I believe that I am fortunate, even blessed to have gone from testing positive for HIV in my youth and reaching middle age. One of the best things that I have done in keeping healthy is to realize that I am a work in progress; maintaining my health and staying healthy is an ongoing process.

The small steps you take can lead you to the big goal. After years of procrastination, I will be joining a gym this month to continue those small steps in maintaining my mental and physical health.

-- Sanford Gaylord

Chicago

How are you healthy?

Study: Family Support Helps Prevent Suicide Among LGBT Youth

via HuffPost Gay Voices

A good support system might be the key to helping deter suicide among gay youth, a new study suggests.

The study, published in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine, evaluated risk factors associated with self harm and suicide among lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender adolescents between ages 16 and 20.

Support from family and friends often acted as an effective preventive factor against inflicting self-harm and suicide among the population.

Adolescents who felt victimized and didn't have a trusted support network were more likely to have suicidal thoughts and inflict harm, the research suggests.

About 94 percent of LGBT youth have experienced some form of victimization, whether it be name-calling or threats, according to a Northwestern University press release.

The study emphasizes the importance of enhancing the availability of support groups for LGBT youth. In addition, it highlights society's responsibility to increase acceptance and reduce the negative stigma sometimes associated with being gay, bisexual or transgender.

Chicago Tribune columnist Dawn Turner Trice observes that parents of LGBT youth may often not know how to deal with issues and societal pressures their children might face.

But researcher and clinical psychologist Brian Mustanski suggests parents should express support instead of judgment to news of their child's sexuality, according to the Northwestern University media release. The conversation may set the tone for an open, trusting relationship.

Mustanski suggests a response like: “You are still the same child as you were before you told me, and I love you just the same.”

But an effective support system is a two-way relationship.

"...What LGBT youth share helps parents act as a resource for their kids,"

Mustanski told the Chicago Tribune.

The study followed 246 Chicago-area LGBT youth from 2007 through 2011. The findings were published on Feb. 14 in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine.


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The Faces Missing from 'The Gay Rights Movement'

via HuffPost Gay Voices, by Zach Stafford

I am a gay, multiracial male who grew up in Tennessee. When I was little I felt like an outsider, like many gay folks, but my "outsider" position was not just because I was gay; it was much more complicated.

I was one of the only people of color in my school, and I was the most effeminate little boy there, as well, which pegged me immediately as a "faggot."

I also was pudgy, not very athletic, and liked video games too much, but those are all minor aspects of why I didn't fit in. Needless to say, no one around me was like me, the puggy, effeminate, brown boy living in the South -- and that was lonely.

As I grew up and got to high school, a few gay kids did start coming out, and I did make some gay friends, but these kids, due to being in a white suburb, were all white.

So my race and my gayness then began to work together, making me feel different, making me feel hopeless, making me unable to consider that it could get better.

When I watched some of my favorite gay-friendly TV shows, like Will & Grace, I would see gay folks having fun, being gay, and enjoying life in a city, most of the time.

This gave me my first insight into what being gay was, and my first suspicion that gay was not like me -- it was wealthy, it was white, and it didn't bother to have people who looked like me for me to look up to, or even begin to understand what my experience was like as a gay person of color.

After graduating from high school, moving to Chicago, and reaching drinking age, I went to the famous Boystown neighborhood and soaked in the abundance of gay bars, restaurants, centers, and anything you can imagine.

However, I felt out of place, like I didn't belong; I remember looking around and noticing that most of the men looked like Abercrombie models, or at least tried to look like them, and were mainly white.
I got very little attention there, and the little attention I got was due to my exoticism, because when one is brown, that could mean one is Brazilian, Egyptian, Puerto Rican... the list goes on. Gay had a look, and I wasn't that look.

So as I watched the YouTube Video "The Gay Rights Movement," which has recently gone viral, I got progressively sadder as the video played through footage of what the gay community seems to consider milestones.

Lots of familiar faces rolled by, and happy emotions did rise inside me, but I still felt hints of sadness, a sadness that was familiar, that wasn't new, and I knew exactly what it was: I, and a lot of other people within the gay community, were not there.

It's not like we weren't ever there; there have been tons of queer folks of color who have done amazing things in America.

For instance, the video shows Martin Luther King Jr., but not his advisor and one of the main powers behind him, Bayard Rustin, a gay black man.

The video shows Ellen Degeneres over and over talking about suicides, but not another famous lesbian who is black, Wanda Sykes.

It shows coverage of the suicides of gay male youths, but not the countless suicides of transgender people, which happen yearly and go quite unnoticed, just like the faces of trans people in the video.

It doesn't show a lot.


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Man Boobs: Play Tackles Body Image, Sex, and Identity

via WindyCityTimes, by Tony Peregrin

A gym-built body and ripped abs ("cum gutters" in porn parlance) can make some gay men fizzy with lust, but when it comes right down to it, being with a partner who is simply comfortable in his own skin can be an even bigger turn-on—an idea that is at the center of the J. Julian Christopher's play, Man Boobs.

The Chicago premiere of Man Boobs— a dark comedy about love, body image and acceptance—opens Pride Film and Plays' 2012 season. In the one-act play, Christopher, 34, a college professor and veteran of the New York International Fringe Festival, introduces audiences to "Spence," a librarian, and "Marty," a macho truck driver who tries to get his paramour into bed—unknowingly pressuring him to reveal more than his overweight torso.

Directed by David Zak and starring Rick Heintz as Spence and Michael Hampton as Marty, Man Boobs opens Saturday, Feb. 18, at 7 Mary's Attic.

In Australia to catch the premiere of Man Boobs, Christopher fielded questions via e-mail about the play and its impact on audiences.

Windy City Times: Let's start with the title of the play: Man Boobs. Why did you select this particular title for your play?

J. Julian Christopher: Honestly, I just thought it was a funny title! I thought it was catchy and [captured] exactly what the play is about. The title doesn't ruin the reveal of the play; a lot of people think there is a revelation about Spence being self-conscious about his body, but to me that isn't a revelation. The play is about how [body image] drives Spence to handle relationships.

Man Boobs also has double meaning for me. A "boob" is often a term for someone acting stupid—and Spence and Marty both act like boobs at certain points in the play.

WCT: Is Man Boobs autobiographical?

JJC: Man Boobs is slightly autobiographical. Spence is based on myself, and Marty is an amalgamation of various men I have dated. I have sabotaged relationship after relationship based on my poor body image, and it is just now, as I have come into my 30s, that I have begun to come out of this idea of what my body "should" look like and embrace the one I have.

WCT: A recent study revealed that almost half of the gay men surveyed would give up a year or more of their lives to have a ripped, gym-body. How do the results of this survey register with you, both as a gay playwright and as a member of the bear community?

JJC: Well, I am definitely a proud member of the bear community, and I honestly hate the findings of this survey—although I think that they are, sadly, quite accurate.

Five years ago, I would have been one of the respondents to this survey who would have given up a year of my life [for this], but I think there does come a time when you finally wake up and look in the mirror and you say "Screw it." That doesn't mean throwing caution to the wind and not taking care of yourself, but it means you start to not care about your ideal of what a perfect body is because it is just that—an ideal.

The play directly deals with the findings of the survey. Spence, the main character, would probably be one of the survey respondents who would voluntarily give up a year or more of his life to look a certain way.

Truthfully, the survey says less about "gay vanity" and more about what we think makes us a better man. This thinking is skewed, and that is why the bear culture exists as it does now, in absolute defiance of that societal norm.

WCT: Man Boobs toured Montréal and Quebec in 2011 and premiered at The Midsumma Festival in Melbourne, Australia, this month. Does it surprise you that the play has struck such a chord with audiences around the world?

JJC: I am not surprised that the play is connecting with people all over the world. I think that body image and self-worth are universal themes. I am, however, often surprised by how audiences react to the piece. Audiences have gasped upon seeing the unapologetic sexuality in the play.

In the beginning, I tried to wrap my brain around why this was happening, but I think it is because straight and gay audiences are not used to seeing two large men explore their sexuality in a truthful and honest way, in a context that is not comedic—and they enjoy it!

In queer theater, we don't really see these kinds of images and it can be quite jarring.

I truly believe that it is still socially acceptable to discriminate and make fun of overweight or obese people, so when Marty and Spence kiss and are enjoying their sexuality in a truthful way, I think that makes most audiences uneasy—purely because it's something they don't see often or have ever seen.

WCT: If the overt sexuality of the play makes some audience members titter in their seats, I have to ask: Do the guys do more than simply kiss on stage?

JJC: The play has lots of sexuality in it. There is nothing more than kissing, but clothes do come off and the kissing is definitely sexual in nature, and much more than just a peck.

WCT: In a recent column on Gay.net titled "No fats, femmes or … the ugly side of online dating," the writer notes that online dating has always featured gay men candidly stating what they want from a partner or fuck buddy in terms of physicality—but with the immediacy afforded by technology and apps like Grindr, these physical expectations have actually gotten more extreme. Do you agree?

JJC: I think that online personal ads are based on the ultimate sexual fantasy. I have also seen personal ads looking for overweight men, men with small penises and men with flat feet. I think that personal ads ultimately serve on purpose—sexual fulfillment.

If people are on Grindr looking for dates, then there is a bigger issue at hand. Finding someone you connect with or a future partner is a different story. I think, inevitably, we learn that what we thought was "our type" isn't always the person we end up with.

WCT: You also produce a Web-based drama series, BULK, which follows the character of Leo Durán as he returns to the New York City bear scene after a devastating break-up. Are you trying to reach the same audience with BULK as you are with Man Boobs?

JJC: I created this series along with D.R. Knott. We wanted to give voice to underrepresented communities, and I believe that the bear community is one of those communities.

The series does have a similar audience as Man Boobs, but that's not to say that I don't want other audiences who are not bears to think that these shows are not meant for them.

I write about relationships—and these guys just happen to be big and furry. I think both BULK and Man Boobs celebrate the sexuality of the bear culture, and the notion is that these characters are real men—they just happen to be larger.


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Testing and Hearing HIV Test Results Together

via The Associated Press, by Carla K. Johnson

CHICAGO — Newly dating and slightly anxious, two men bared their arms for blood tests and pondered the possibility that one of them, or both, could be infected with HIV.

An innovative program — called Testing Together — would allow them to hear their test results minutes later, while sitting side by side.

In this Jan. 5, 2012 photo, Dominic Poteste, left, and Eric Zemanovic pose before taking HIV tests together at the Howard Brown Health Center in Chicago.

Testing Together, now under way in Chicago and Atlanta, takes an unusual approach: It encourages gay male couples to get tested together and hear their results together.

In this Jan. 5, 2012 photo, Dominic Poteste, left, and Eric Zemanovic pose before taking HIV tests together at the Howard Brown Health Center in Chicago.

Testing Together, now under way in Chicago and Atlanta, takes an unusual approach: It encourages gay male couples to get tested together and hear their results together. 

.Eric Zemanovic, a dental hygienist, and Dominic Poteste, a restaurant server, had been dating two months after a yearlong friendship. In the past, they'd both practiced safe sex and got regular HIV tests.

Both are in their early 30s. They'd grown up when AIDS meant an early, horrible death. So, whenever they heard about friends testing positive, they felt pangs of fear.

Poteste explained: "There's always an anxiety that comes with getting tested, even though 99 percent of the time I've been safe and been careful, there still is always ..."

His voice trailed off.

"A slight possibility," Zemanovic completed the sentence.

"A slight possibility," Poteste agreed.

Testing Together, now under way in Chicago and Atlanta, takes an unusual approach: It encourages gay male couples to get tested together and hear their results together.

After delivering the results, a counselor talks with the couple about what to do next, including agreements they may want to make with each other about sex and health.

Are we agreeing to be monogamous? Is any sexual activity outside the relationship OK? How are we going to protect each other from infection? Couples address these questions and more.

The idea is to bring honesty to sexual relationships, said one of the researchers behind the program, Rob Stephenson of the Rollins School of Public Health at Emory University in Atlanta.

Relationships offer only "mythical protection" from HIV, Stephenson said. Some couples may have avoided talking about each other's HIV status, thinking, "If he were HIV positive he would have told me," or "If he wanted to know, he would have asked."

Poteste and Zemanovic, the newly dating Chicago couple, differed in their past approaches. Zemanovic was in the habit of asking his sex partners about their HIV status; he was "neurotic" about it, he said.

Poteste hadn't been as sexually active as his new boyfriend, but he hadn't always asked the questions: Have you been tested? What's your status?

"You have an assumption that if there's something this person could do to potentially hurt me, they would tell me," he said.

Zemanovic hoped getting tested together and discussing results with a counselor would build trust between them.

Poteste hoped the counselor could help them start a conversation so they could ask and answer difficult questions.

It started in Africa more than 20 years ago. Researchers believe couples testing has successfully reduced the spread of AIDS among married, heterosexual couples in some African regions.

One study that looked at couples where one spouse is HIV positive and the other is HIV negative estimated that couples testing was cutting the rate of transmission by more than half.

In Washington, D.C., where the rate of HIV infection rivals some African nations, some community agencies allow couples to test together. Family and Medical Counseling Service Inc. has been testing about 145 couples together annually since 2008. Most are heterosexual couples.

In Chicago and Atlanta, Testing Together, funded by the MAC AIDS Fund, hopes to test 400 couples by the end of the year.
___
Each participant in Testing Together signs a consent form that addresses receiving counseling, testing and results with a partner in the same room at the same time with a trained counselor: "I hereby consent to allow my partner to know the results of my HIV test," it begins.

The program challenges conventional practices in the United States, where HIV testing is usually private and for individuals only. At most other clinics, a man who asks if his partner can be there when he hears his test result is denied because of patient confidentiality concerns.

There are two trends fueling Testing Together. One, the number of gay Americans telling the U.S. Census they're living with same-sex partners nearly doubled in the past decade, to about 650,000 couples. About half those same-sex partnerships are gay men.

What's more, a new line of research suggests that up to 68 percent of new HIV infections in gay men come from a main sex partner, not from casual sex, in part because main sex partners are more likely to forgo condoms.

Counselors are trained on how to deliver test results, with particular emphasis on how to tell partners the most difficult news: one partner has the virus and the other doesn't.

With these so-called "HIV discordant" couples, counselors have a great opportunity to reduce the spread of the virus by helping the couple learn ways to protect the uninfected partner, primarily through correct and consistent condom use.

Counselors are trained to dispel myths. If the couple thinks the test result means one partner has been unfaithful, the counselor might point out that the infected partner could have acquired HIV before the partner became a couple.

If the couple believes the virus is "sleeping" and can't be transmitted, the counselor might explain that HIV can be transmitted even if there are no signs or symptoms.

If the couple believes their status is proof that precautions aren't needed, the counselor might explain that HIV could be transmitted in the future as the infected partner's virus levels rise.

Sam Hoehnle is a counselor in the Chicago program. "It never becomes easier emotionally" to deliver the news to an HIV discordant couple, Hoehnle said. He tells the HIV negative partner his results first, then spends more time and attention on the HIV positive partner.

He's seen partners support each other, but he acknowledges he can't read minds. A show of compassion could mask anger or fear.

"You don't know what's happening internally, in their heads, about how they're feeling about each other," he said.


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Illinois Looking Towards Marriage Equality

via HuffPost Gay Voices, by Waymon Hudson

A group of Illinois legislators and civil rights organizations has started holding meetings to strategize on moving from civil unions to full marriage equality for LGBT couples.

Illinois state representatives Greg Harris, Deb Mell, Ann Williams, Kelly Cassidy, and Sara Feigenholtz, and state senator Heather Steans, as well as groups like Equality Illinois, Log Cabin Republicans, the ACLU, Lambda Legal, The Civil Rights Agenda, and the Human Rights Campaign, are looking at how to move forward legislatively on marriage rights for same-sex couples.

Representative Greg Harris told the Windy City Times that the legislation wouldn't be introduced until 2013 at the earliest, and he gave some insight into how difficult it could be: "I do not delude myself into thinking this will be an easy process.

But we need to take the first step. We have to be ready to stand up and defend the gains that we've made and to look toward the next steps."

The road ahead for marriage equality in the state does indeed look difficult, but not impossible.
Among the strongest opposition is the highly influential and politically powerful Catholic Church.

In September the Catholic Conference of Illinois announced the formation of a "Defense of Marriage" department, whose sole purpose is to fight any future attempts to legalize same-sex marriage in the state.

The stated goal of the department is to protect the "stature of the nuclear family -- which provides love, stability and confidence to children, as well as organization to society."

The "Defense of Marriage" department has already started throwing out incendiary (and scientifically unfounded) claims about the "dangers" of marriage equality:

"The effects [of same-sex marriage] are evident in the performance of children in school, in truancy and crime rates, and in an ailing culture that too often values feeling good over self-giving, and individuality over the common good."

The Catholic Church's hostility toward equal rights for LGBT people in the state has indeed been ratcheting up. We've seen the drawn-out legal battle between Catholic Charities and the state of Illinois over the organization's state-funded adoption and foster care contracts, and their refusal to grant those services to same-sex couples in civil unions, which ended in a loss for the church.

This has led to a growing tension between the church hierarchy and advancing civil rights.

Cardinal Francis George of Chicago recently compared the city's gay pride parade to the Ku Klux Klan, sparking outrage, protests, and an eventual half-apology from the cardinal.

Even Pope Benedict himself has continued the attacks on marriage equality, saying this week that gay marriage was a threat to the traditional family that undermined "the future of humanity itself."

With well-organized and well-funded opposition like this, pushing for legislation allowing same-sex couples to marry will be difficult.

But there are concrete examples that can be used to educate the public and legislature about the basic unfairness of the separate and unequal status that civil unions create for gay couples in the state.

The previously mentioned fight between Catholic Charities and the state over the $30 million in taxpayer dollars that Catholic Charities received from the state of Illinois for foster care and adoption services was based on excluding same-sex couples in civil unions.

There was also the case of the Springfield, Ill. Joint Labor/Management Insurance Committee deciding not to cover health benefits for the civil-union partners of city employees.

The committee used the different relationship status of same-sex couples and married heterosexual couples to carve out the exemption to civil-union spouses.

They cited the benefits for same-sex couples being too costly, which is an argument that would never be accepted when applied to a more universally understood institution like full marriage.

Public outrage eventually made them change their decision and cover all couples equally.


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[VIDEO] PrEP Talk with Dr. Kimberly Smith Pt. 3

The following video interview comes from Dr. Kimberly Y. Smith, who is an infectious disease specialist at RUSH University Medical Center; in the following clip Dr. Smith discusses the promise of pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP), recommendations for use, and potential challenges.

We encourage others to share their experiences, thoughts, concerns, or questions they may have about PrEP and HIV prevention strategies here on LifeLube. Again we encourage all to share your perspectives at myprepexperience@gmail.com!

See the video here too

Click here to pull up all the My PrEP Experience stories posted on LifeLube, including video and written testimonials, from other people sharing their PrEP* experiences. Please feel free to share your reactions in the comments section. And if you have used PrEP, we invite you to share your PrEP experience by video, or in writing. Why did you make the decision to use PrEP? What were some of the challenges you faced in making this decision? How is taking PrEP working out for you? How has it impacted your life? Send video or audio links and/or text to myprepexperience@gmail.com and we will post them here, on LifeLube.  You can include your name, or you may contribute to My PrEP Experience anonymously. Your voice is important!  Please consider sharing your personal experience with PrEP at My PrEP Experience

[VIDEO] PrEP Talk with Dr. Kimberly Smith Pt. 2

The following video interview comes from Dr. Kimberly Y. Smith, who is an infectious disease specialist at RUSH University Medical Center; in the following clip Dr. Smith discusses the promise of pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP), recommendations for use, and potential challenges.

We encourage others to share their experiences, thoughts, concerns, or questions they may have about PrEP and HIV prevention strategies here on LifeLube. Again we encourage all to share your perspectives at myprepexperience@gmail.com!

See the video here too

Click here to pull up all the My PrEP Experience stories posted on LifeLube, including video and written testimonials, from other people sharing their PrEP* experiences. Please feel free to share your reactions in the comments section. And if you have used PrEP, we invite you to share your PrEP experience by video, or in writing. Why did you make the decision to use PrEP? What were some of the challenges you faced in making this decision? How is taking PrEP working out for you? How has it impacted your life? Send video or audio links and/or text to myprepexperience@gmail.com and we will post them here, on LifeLube.  You can include your name, or you may contribute to My PrEP Experience anonymously. Your voice is important!  Please consider sharing your personal experience with PrEP at My PrEP Experience.

[VIDEO] PrEP Talk with Dr. Kimberly Smith Pt. 1

The following video interview comes from Dr. Kimberly Y. Smith, who is an infectious disease specialist at RUSH University Medical Center; in the following clip Dr. Smith discusses the promise of pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP), recommendations for use, and potential challenges.

We encourage others to share their experiences, thoughts, concerns, or questions they may have about PrEP and HIV prevention strategies here on LifeLube. Again we encourage all to share your perspectives at myprepexperience@gmail.com!




See video here too

Click here to pull up all the My PrEP Experience stories posted on LifeLube, including video and written testimonials, from other people sharing their PrEP* experiences. Please feel free to share your reactions in the comments section. And if you have used PrEP, we invite you to share your PrEP experience by video, or in writing. Why did you make the decision to use PrEP? What were some of the challenges you faced in making this decision? How is taking PrEP working out for you? How has it impacted your life? Send video or audio links and/or text to myprepexperience@gmail.com and we will post them here, on LifeLube.  You can include your name, or you may contribute to My PrEP Experience anonymously. Your voice is important!  Please consider sharing your personal experience with PrEP at My PrEP Experience.

Center on Halsted presents MONDO: Building and strengthening the community as an openly HIV-positive man - December 2

U.S. Conference on AIDS

via Windy City Times, by Kate Sosin

The U.S. Conference on AIDS, held this year in Chicago for the first time, opened with a welcoming plenary breakfast that featured major names in HIV/AIDS prevention.

Secretary Kathleen Sebelius of the Department of Health and Human Services headlined the morning.
 
But the moment that left many talking later in the day was a protest that interrupted the introduction of Sebelius. As Sebelius was announced with much fanfare, a large group of protesters with posters marched out and stole the microphone.
 
The group, protesting on behalf of Asian Pacific Islanders, demanded that their voices be heard in HIV prevention. They came bearing signs that read "Our Lives Matter."
 
"We cannot to wait," said Sharon Day of the Indigenous Peoples Task Force. "We, the first Americans, can no longer be the last in line for funding."
 
In what appeared to be a last-minute switch, National AIDS Policy Director Jeff Crowley took the stage in place of Sebelius. Crowley had been scheduled to speak later in the program.
 
Crowley challenged HIV service providers to adapt to healthcare changes and medical advancements to end AIDS. He called for focus and unity from AIDS organizations as pre-exposure prophylaxis (taking HIV meds to prevent becoming infected with HIV) is now a tool on the horizon.
 
"That is great news but right now it's a research study," said Crowley, who pressed providers to think realistically about how new science can be used to end HIV/AIDS. "I would ask all of you in this time of fundamental change to really seize the moment."
 
Protesters appeared a second time as Sebelius attempted to take the stage. She acknowledged the group before they sat down.
 
According to staffers for the National Minority AIDS Council, the organization that hosts the annual conference, organizers had anticipated the protest, although the last-minute swap of presenters appeared to be unscripted.
 
Sebelius spoke of the Obama administration's commitment to ending AIDS. She said the president had requested $50 million in additional funds for the AIDS Drug Assistance Program, which currently suffers from lack of funds, leaving thousands on a waiting list for HIV/AIDS treatment.
 
Despite the implementation of the Affordable Care Act, which will provide health insurance to Americans by 2014, Sebelius said that the administration remains committed to Ryan White funding (that money has funded HIV/AIDS treatment for patients without insurance who cannot afford to pay).
 
The secretary added that her department is working to reallocate funding to communities considered high-risk currently.
 
Sebelius echoed the sentiments of many at the conference, who argue that the current moment is critical for mobilizing to end AIDS. Experts say that given new advances in science, an end to the virus is on the horizon, but those advancements have also led to apathy as the those who contract HIV and get treatment can live healthier and longer lives than ever before.
 
Further, significant funding increases are needed if those treatments are to be implemented.
 
"We have some very important questions to ask ourselves today," Sebelius said. "What will we do with this opportunity … will we watch HIV/AIDS further recede from the national spotlight?"
 
In a special press conference after her appearance, Sebelius reaffirmed her commitment to Ryan White funding, stating that those funds will now fill "cracks in the system, not gaping holes." She also commented on the morning's protest.
 
"They were saying 'our lives matter,' and my response is, you bet they do," she said.
Thousands attended the breakfast, the first of four days of conference events.
 
David Ernesto Munar, president of the AIDS Foundation of Chicago, welcomed the conference on behalf of the host committee.
 
Munar encouraged conference attendees to adopt a Chicago attitude while in town.
 
"Chicagoans are a roll up your sleeves kind of people," Munar said. "I hope the hardy spirit of Chicago rubs off on you," because, he said, there is much work to be done to end AIDS.


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Continuing Challenges for Gay Service Members

via Medill Reports, by JR Tungol

Gay servicemen and women say they still face discrimination and challenges as they mark Veterans Day Friday, the first since the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell on Sept. 20.

Leonardo Lucio, a 39-year-old Navy reservist, came out standing at a podium addressing a crowd at the Center on Halsted, an LGBT resource center, the day DADT was repealed.

On Wednesday, Lucio received his photo for the national NOH8 Campaign, a photographic silent protest created by celebrity photographer Adam Bouska and partner Jeff Parshley in direct response to the passage of Proposition 8, the California ballot initiative that banned same-sex marriage.

In a message to fellow servicemen and women, Lucio said he “was happy and proud to have been used as a model for NOH8 (No Hate).”

Lucio, who has served in the Navy for more than 21 years, will be a guest speaker Friday for Veterans Day in Chicago with American Veterans for Equal Rights.

Despite the public support he has received, Lucio was accosted at work by a veteran who yelled a gay slur at him. Lucio is a supervisory claims assistant at Jesse Brown VA Medical Center in Chicago.

“He humiliated me in front of my staff,” he said. “This is my reality.”

Last weekend Lucio attended his first drill weekend in Milwaukee, after re-enlisting for six more years.
“I could’ve retired last year, but I knew the repeal was coming and I wanted to know how it would feel to serve in the Navy openly,” he said. “I came out to my roommate. I said, ‘I’m not married. I have a partner. I’m gay,’ and he said ‘it’s cool.’”

But homophobic jokes still linger. Two straight servicemen joked about taking each other to the Navy ball because of the repeal. Lucio stayed quiet.

“This is the bottom line,” he said. “I’ve – we’ve, my partner and I – have been programmed and trained to suppress, hide and lie, that it’s still hard to speak out sometimes.”

The repeal of the Defense of Marriage Act is necessary so gay servicemen and women have the same rights married personnel have, including family housing allowance and the ability to transfer bases together, Lucio said.

“We’re still second-class citizens,” he said. “The end of DADT is a big step but a small step at the same time.”

James Darby, president of the Chicago chapter of American Veterans for Equal Rights and the only gay member of the Advisory Council of Veteran Affairs for the city, was the man Lucio approached to come out publicly.

Darby, an 80-year-old retired South Side teacher and Korean War veteran thought Don’t Ask Don’t Tell would never be repealed.

“The change doesn’t affect veterans as much as it does active servicemen,” Darby said. “Now comes DOMA. Then gay people in the military can get most of their rights and federal benefits will be available to everyone – including me.”

AVER’s mission is to advocate and speak for closeted U.S. personnel. Darby said that there are veterans who are still afraid of coming out because they think their pensions might be taken away.

This Veterans Day celebration is particularly resonant for Darby because it will be the first time AVER will have an out, active service member speak.

Lucio, who grew up in Chicago Heights with Allen Schindler, the 22-year-old sailor who gained national attention for being brutally murdered by two shipmates in 1992, said his involvement with AVER and OutServe, an advocacy group for gay military personnel, is what brings him joy.

“I didn’t think at first I would be a role-model,” Lucio said. “Now, I cannot get enough and I cannot say enough. After 21 years, I need to be an example for the younger soldiers – I need to be brave.”


See the rest

Our Last Forum of 2011, Get Freaky - is Now LIVE on the Feast of Fun Podcast

 LifeLube's last community forum of 2011was held last night - and we discussed sex, sex, sex. Check out the Feast of Fun podcast from the event here.

This forum was co-sponsored by the Chicago Black Gay Men's Caucus. LifeLube partners include Center on Halsted - where the forum was held - TPAN, Howard Brown Health Center, and AIDS Foundation of Chicago.

We had sex toy demos during the reception - thanks to Cupids, Tulip and Early to Bed for making that happen!

Thanks to our wonderful panelists -

* Gary Bucher - anal health specialist, dir. Anal Dysplasia Clinic Midwest
* Debby Herbenick - sex researcher, Time OUT Chicago's sex columnist
* John Stryker - Howard Brown Health Center nurse practitioner

And of course - much love and appreciation to our hosts/moderators - Feast of Fun. Check out the podcast from the event here.

See more photos like the ones below, courtesy of Ed Negron, here on Facebook.

Check out the podcast from the event here.

More photos are here on Facebook.

Join LifeLube and Friends Tuesday Oct 25 and Get Freaky

It's all about those things that "go bump in the night."

Please join Feast of Fun, Project CRYSP, LifeLube and the Chicago Black Gay Men's Caucus on Tuesday, October 25 at the Center on Halsted for Project CRYSP's final gay men's health forum and live podcast taping.

Join us for a "gay birds and the bees" and ask a renowned panel of gay/bi men's health sexperts the questions that weren't covered in your high school sex ed class.

Cash bar, free snacks + sex toy demos too.

Your Evening's Fabulous Sexperts:

*Gary Bucher - anal health specialist, dir. Anal Dysplasia Clinic Midwest
*Debby Herbenick - sex researcher, Time OUT Chicago's sex columnist
*John Stryker - Howard Brown Health Center nurse practitioner

Click for more info and to RSVP for this FREE forum.

Click here for the sexy forum poster.

Chicago GLHF 2011 Inductees

via Windy City Times

Eleven individuals and four organizations will be inducted in November into the Chicago Gay and Lesbian Hall of Fame, the country's only known government-sponsored hall of fame that honors members of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) communities.

The inductees were selected by a subcommittee composed of former inductees, which reviewed nominations submitted by members of the public.

 The names were released by the Hall of Fame Committee of the Chicago Commission on Human Relations' Advisory Council on Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Issues, a municipal government agency, in conjunction with the recently formed � 501(c)(3) support organization, Friends of the Chicago Gay and Lesbian Hall of Fame.

The chosen nominees will be inducted at the Chicago Gay and Lesbian Hall of Fame's annual ceremony, which will take place on the evening of Wednesday, November 9, at the Chicago History Museum,1601 N. Clark St., Chicago. The event will be free and open to the public.

"It makes us proud that, even 20 years after our first ceremony, there are still important figures from the past and a constantly growing list of current Chicagoans whose accomplishments and community contributions merit being honored by the Hall of Fame," said Lourdes Rodriguez, co-chairperson of the Hall of Fame Committee and of the Friends of the Chicago Gay and Lesbian Hall of Fame.

"Though municipal budget problems have restricted government financial support for the Hall of Fame this year, we are grateful that individual Chicagoans have stepped forward to assist us, through Friends of the Chicago Gay and Lesbian Hall of Fame, in maintaining a needed and historically significant institution," said Gary Chichester, the other co-chairperson of the committee and of the Friends organization.

The Chicago Gay and Lesbian Hall of Fame was established in 1991 under the auspices of the Advisory Council, with support from the Chicago Commission on Human Relations and then-Mayor Richard M. Daley.

Its purpose is to recognize the achievements of LGBT Chicagoans, their contributions to the development of the city, and the help they have received from others.

In 2011, it marks its 20th anniversary, holds its 21st annual induction ceremony, and enjoys continuing status as an official recognition by city government of Chicago's LGBT residents and their allies.

Those inducted fall into one of three categories: Individual, Organization, or Friend of the Community. Nominees represent all of Chicago's sexual-minority communities, including LGBT Chicagoans, past, present, living, and dead, as well as those who have supported or assisted them.


Read the rest and see the list of inductees

"A Day with HIV in America" Take Your Best Shot!

via PRNewswire

Positively Aware magazine sponsors 2nd annual photo essay to be published in Nov/Dec 2011 issue

Whether you're HIV negative or positive, live with HIV or care for someone with HIV, Positively Aware, is asking people to share their stories through the lens of a camera on one, single day, September 21.

The second annual A Day with HIV in America will capture the collective portrait of those living with HIV to help remove the stigma of HIV and to advance a community of care and support.

Positively Aware, a leading magazine devoted to HIV treatment, is inviting people across America to snap a digital photograph at any time over the course of Wednesday, September 21.

Participants can record a portrait, time with friends and family at work or play, or any moment in the day that helps the world better understand how HIV affects their lives. Photos are to be submitted by September 26 on the A Day with HIV in America web site.

Follow A Day with HIV in America's Facebook page or on Twitter @A_Day_With_HIV to see updates and selected photographs, and to share the site and its vision with friends to help spread the word.

"We're asking all Americans affected by HIV to share with all of us an image of their life living with HIV," said Jeff Berry, editor of Positively Aware.

"Their vantage points captured over a single day will create a rich photographic tapestry of hope, strength and support that will help tear away the stigma of living with HIV in America today."

The final photos selected for the photo essay of A Day with HIV in America will be announced in October 2011 and will be published in the November/December issue of Positively Aware magazine.

 Positively Aware will also premiere the photos at the U.S. Conference on AIDS, November 10-13 in Chicago, Ill.

To learn more about this year's project, see last year's winners and to make your photo submission, visit, A Day with HIV in America.
Read the rest.

Why Shannon Cunningham Rides [a "How are you healthy?" special feature]

Does riding 200-miles in two-days make you a healthier person? Perhaps. Does riding 200-miles in two-days to improve someone else’s life make you a healthier person? Maybe. Health is so much more than physical. Mental, spiritual, and emotional health is a part of staying “healthy”.  The choices we make in our lives contribute to the overall health and happiness we experience. Below is one of several stories from participants of an annual event called the Ride for AIDS Chicago. The Ride for AIDS Chicago is a two-day, 200-mile charity cycling event that raises money for Test Positive Aware Network (TPAN) and partner agencies. TPAN and the partner agencies that benefit from the Ride for AIDS Chicago provide direct service to those living with HIV and help prevent the spread of the virus through information dissemination, HIV testing, and education.

Why I ride? Great question.

If you asked me ”why I ride” when I signed up in January, I would have said that I’m committed to being a better steward to my community.

If you asked me”why I ride” when I got my first donation, I would have said, because I can make a difference $25 at a time.

If you asked me ”why I ride” when I got to know the great people of TPAN I would have said, because this organization is amazing and I want to help make a difference.

If you asked me ”why I ride” when I when I went to my first PFLAG meeting and got to listen to Richard speak, I would have said, “For you, Richard.”

If you asked my “why I ride” after this past Sunday, I would have say, “I ride because I’ve come to the realization this Cause needs me as much I need this Cause. “ I needed support on the course after a fall and suddenly felt an overwhelming sense that my fall somehow equated to me being a burden as a result of my own actions.

Then it hit me: I wonder how many diagnosed with HIV/AIDS feel like a burden? How can I help change that?

This is more than just a physical challenge of the Ride, or the financial commitment to raise money.

I want to help change the way people see themselves and help guide them to their own greatness.

That’s why I ride today.

-- Shannon Cunningham
Chicago

How are you healthy?
Please join the hundreds who have shared their tips.
Tell us HERE. Send a pic to the same place.
And we'll blog it, right here on LifeLube.
Gay men and all allies welcome to participate.
Read past posts.
Learn more about the campaign

Why Shaine Wynsma Rides [a "How are you healthy?" special feature]

Does riding 200-miles in two-days make you a healthier person? Perhaps. Does riding 200-miles in two-days to improve someone else’s life make you a healthier person? Maybe. Health is so much more than physical. Mental, spiritual, and emotional health is a part of staying “healthy”.  The choices we make in our lives contribute to the overall health and happiness we experience. Below is one of several stories from participants of an annual event called the Ride for AIDS Chicago. The Ride for AIDS Chicago is a two-day, 200-mile charity cycling event that raises money for Test Positive Aware Network (TPAN) and partner agencies. TPAN and the partner agencies that benefit from the Ride for AIDS Chicago provide direct service to those living with HIV and help prevent the spread of the virus through information dissemination, HIV testing, and education.

It started with a Life List.

One of the items on that list I put down was to do a ride or marathon. I am not much of a runner, but I love, love, love to bike. So a ride it had to be. I had only heard about the ride in California and that is what I had set my sights on. I was at the doctors for a routine check up and my doctor told me about the TPAN ride and said that I would have no problem doing it.

I got a bike from Ebay. Raised some money and learned more about TPAN and their programs. The Ride at that time was roughly 180 miles. I managed to do it with no clips, on a heavy mountain bike. I don’t even think I had padded shorts.

“All you have to do is pedal,” is what I kept on telling myself. 

Mile after mile, hill after hill and the second I crossed the finish line, I wanted to do it again.

A couple of months before that ride, I found out a really good friend of mine, Greg Fanning, had passed away. He was found in his apartment alone. Greg had a great soul, provided lots of laughs and had an amazing talent of rehabbing wood furniture.

He had his share of demons he was dealing with. He wasn’t very familiar with TPAN's support programs for those dealing with HIV. I was one of a few people that he could relate too. From then on, there was/is an additional element to the Ride, other than the personal and physical challenge.

I can’t help to wonder that if Greg was more aware of TPAN and what they could have provided him, if he would still be around today, making me laugh uncontrollably and amazing me with his ability to magically turn an old rocking chair or nicked up table into a stunning piece of art. For that year, 2007, I rode in his name.

That is why Shaine rides, to make sure the doors stay open at TPAN and people are aware of the programs there, so the art and laughter stay alive, which is tops on my Life List.

-- Shaine Wynsma
Chicago

How are you healthy?
Please join the hundreds who have shared their tips.
Tell us HERE. Send a pic to the same place.
And we'll blog it, right here on LifeLube.
Gay men and all allies welcome to participate.
Read past posts.
Learn more about the campaign

Dance For Life Sparks Reflections on His First Anniversary

This week marks the one-year anniversary of my infection with HIV. I have given some thought and prayer on how I should mark this anniversary.  

Should I even celebrate the anniversary?

Should I not think the marking of it as a celebration at all – especially since it includes feelings of sadness, loss, anger, but then there are also feelings of much gratitude and hope…?

Should I celebrate alone or with others?

Saturday night I attended the 20th Anniversary Performance of Chicago's “Dance for Life” event. It was a beautiful and powerful performance by committed artists and dancers who believe in and support our fight to end AIDS. As the celebration began, the CEO of the AIDS Foundation of Chicago announced that it was not only the 20th anniversary of the “Dance for Life”, but also the 6-month anniversary of his becoming the CEO and more importantly the 17th year of being infected and living with the virus. People applauded wildly after he announced the 20th year for the event; but it came obvious that many did not know how to respond to the announcement of the anniversary of his infection 17 years ago. A few in the large audience applauded but many remained silent with most of them, I am sure, pondering how to respond to such an announcement – the anniversary of someone’s infection with HIV/AIDS.

How should I mark MY one-year anniversary and should I identify it as a celebration? Should I mark it alone or with others, at least with one or two who know and offer me much support in my life with HIV? As I lay awake on my bed at 4am Sunday morning, those questions entered the deeper part of my heart, mind and spirit.

I certainly experience much, much gratitude for the medication and medical attention I have been able to receive over the past year. I take daily medication that is keeping my viral load undetectable and CD4 count at a very normal and healthy level. It is very expensive medication and medical treatment, yet my work health insurance plan makes it possible. I am also especially grateful that our health insurance companies in this country can no longer deny me coverage for having a “pre-existing” illness in case I were to switch employment.

The gratitude, however, is mixed with much sorrow, sadness and often anger since there are so many of my fellow life travelers living with HIV/AIDS who do not have this access to medication and healthcare. In our country, which is the wealthiest in the world, many go without medications or easy access to care, and in the world many are still dying of a disease that is no longer fatal if one is provided with medications and medical attention.

My anger especially flares up when I hear so many people, mostly out of ignorance and close-mindedness, oppose expanding health insurance for infected individuals living with the virus (and all others who need it) through our recently adopted health care reform. I am glad “Obama cares” enough for us and millions others in our country who need to know they will now be able see a doctor and get needed medications, especially when they are in pain or worried about their health.

I have always tried to take good care of my body through a healthy diet, sufficient exercise and adequate sleep. During the past year this approach to taking care of my body took special significance. The medications and treatment cannot on their own keep me healthy as my body fights the virus on a daily basis. And so this week I am also grateful for the opportunities I have to keep my body fit and healthy. I have access to a gym, nutritious food, and a decent and safe house where I can rest and take care of myself. I have them because I have a good job that allows me such opportunities.

But again anger flares up in my heart and gut when I consider the many who do not have these opportunities today, especially a home or a job that allows them to take care of themselves and their chronic illnesses. As the rich keep getting richer in our nation and the poor and middle class lose more and more income on a yearly basis, homes and jobs seem to become much less available to many among us.

Finally, should I celebrate the experience that I nowadays have of having somewhat befriended the virus that lives within my body? I wish with all my heart it did not live there or in the bodies of any human being in this world. Yet it is there. And until researchers find the cure for HIV/AIDS, it will continue to be an intimate part of my body and life. I am reminded of that every day as I take my $50-a-day pill to keep the virus undetectable in my blood stream.

In a year’s time I have learned how to accept that I am HIV positive and to see opportunities for growth as a person, especially in hospitality and compassion. 

I have worked for a number of years in the field that fights against AIDS and supports those living with the virus. But nowadays I have much more solidarity in heart and mind with them. I am one of them and with them today.

I have always tried to practice hospitality and compassion because of my spiritual faith. When persons are hospitable, they “makes room” in their lives for others. And there are so many ways to do so with persons living with the virus: by sharing our resources for the fight against AIDS like so many did last night at the 2011 Dance for Life event; or supporting directly infected individuals and families with much personal care and love; or not judging or stigmatizing them out of ignorance; or by working actively and politically for the resources and opportunities sick people need to remain healthy. I have always tried to practice hospitality in my life; but now that the virus lives within me, I am all the more committed to “making room” in my life for those who travel through this life with the virus in their bodies.

I learned a long time ago that truly compassionate persons are those that know how to suffer with others. The very word compassion comes from the Latin words to “suffer” (passus) and “with” (cum).

My spiritual faith has allowed and supported me to suffer with others in my life over the years. But now that the virus lives within me, I can accompany those infected by HIV/AIDS in a much stronger and closer way. I have and I am dealing with the fear, the anxiety, and the worries that this virus could one day compromise my immune system that keeps us humans alive and healthy. But I also share much more closely the hope and the dreams with other persons living with HIV/AIDS. Nowadays we may be able to live until an old age and enjoy life to its fullest. After the one year, I am all the more compassionate since I can suffer and hope much more closely with my fellow HIV positive life travelers.

Maybe one day before I die, the virus will leave my body through some type of cure. But until it does, I am learning to live with it. It is an unwelcomed friend. But it is a friend since it is making me a more hospitable and compassionate person in this life.

I guess I can celebrate the one year anniversary of my infection.

 
-- Thoughts from a Chicagoan living with HIV


[pics by ed negron. check out the rest on the lifelube facebook page]