Showing posts with label sexism. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sexism. Show all posts

Thursday, February 9, 2012

A Flaming New Anthology

via HuffPost Gay Voices, by Emerson Whitney

A bathroom view of two side-by-side urinals is the book jacket graphic for Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore's new anthology, Why Are Faggots So Afraid of Faggots?

In a femme and fearless metaphor, one of the urinals is stuffed full of jewelry, flowers, and other colorful, queer-looking flotsam -- a nod to the book's anthological content, featuring "flaming challenges to masculinity, objectification, and the desire to conform," as the subtitle reads.

In anticipation of the book's official launch -- slated to take place, appropriately, on Valentine's Day -- Ms. Sycamore spoke with me while on her West Coast book tour.

"The book is dedicated to exposing hierarchies wherever they exist," said Ms. Sycamore of Why Are Faggots So Afraid of Faggots?

The book was born, she said, out of frustrations with the "gay male" sex scene that she inhabits, and the hierarchies within it: internet cruising, sexual commoditization, and assimilationist culture.

"It's about flaming challenges to all of that," she said. "Flaming as in flamboyant and queenie and outside the conventional binary, but also in the sense of lighting things on fire."

She paused. We laughed.

Since her first book, Tricks and Treats: Sex Workers Write About Their Clients, published in 2000, Ms. Sycamore's work has lit lots of us on fire.

Why Are Faggots So Afraid of Faggots? is her fifth anthology in a string of wildly popular works -- at least, in the queer scene -- including her much-acclaimed Nobody Passes: Rejecting the Rules of Gender and Conformity (2007) and That's Revolting! Queer Strategies for Resisting Assimilation (2008).

"Like always with my anthologies, the idea for this one stemmed from a question that's coming from my own life experience and the cultures I'm involved in," she said.

"In my life, I feel really inspired by trans/genderqueer and gender-nonconforming communities that I inhabit. But in a very personal way, I feel less and less hopeful in the sexual spaces I find myself. Gay male space often mimics the grossest norms of everything I hate."

Ms. Sycamore and I discussed cyber cruising scenarios, including the use of Grindr, a gay cruising app for the iPhone. (For further reading, visit a new website called "Douchebags of Grinder," aimed at exposing extreme examples of racist, ableist, classist, and other stereotypical gay male sexual exclusivity, as illustrated by profiles on Grinder.)

"'No femmes or fatties' is practically the mantra of gay cruising culture on the Web," she said. "This gross kind of hierarchical regimentation has become so normalized, to such an extent that most gays don't take the time to say, 'Oh, that's fucked up.'"

Ms. Sycamore described an experience she had attempting to say "that's fucked up" to a random cruiser.
"Someone had one of those standard posts with all the 'don'ts,' and this one was 'no Asians,'" she said.

"I wrote, 'I'd prefer no racists,' and the person responded by saying, 'Don't be sore just because you're Asian.'"

Ms. Sycamore is not Asian, and she was appalled at the expectation she shouldn't be offended by a racist comment if she is not member of the race the comment is perpetrated against.

"I wonder whatever happened to our dream of a world of sexual splendor?" she said. "The dream of a sexually inclusive utopia.

Today, instead of imagination, we just have regimentation. The gay culture started out so we'd have a place to express ourselves sexually. Where's all the glamor and joy and sustainability now?"

The stories of 31 different authors were compiled in Why Are Faggots So Afraid of Faggots? in an attempt to answer this question.

And according to Ms. Sycamore, the authors and their subjects are as varied as the alternatives to sexual assimilation.

"For example, there's a piece by a straight, female prison guard about the interaction between homophobia and male-on-male desire in prison," she said.

"And there's another story about how drag king culture sometimes takes on the same kinds of prioritization of masculinity as in the gay male and heteronormative communities.

Even in a performance that is based on gender fluidity, still there's a hierarchy. It's amazing!"


Read the rest

Monday, November 23, 2009

Unmasking subtle heterosexism: Microaggressions and microvalidations in everyday life

via The Sexual Continuum, by Dr. Brian Mustanski

Excerpt:


After reading this article on microaggressions in the APA Monitor I have been spending a lot of time thinking about this topic. I have been particularly curious about how gay and lesbian people may experience these kinds of microaggressions and how we might go about studying their occurrence and effects. I turns out almost no research has been done on LGBT people and microaggressions. So I started paying attention and making a note of various kinds of experiences I have in my daily life and recent travels. Here are a few examples of things I have recently experienced:

A customs agent pointedly agent asking my partner and I if we are "friends." While I thought about correcting him and saying in fact we are partners, I eventually decided it wasn't worth it. I wasn't entirely sure why he said it the way he did and didn't want to raise an issue that may not have existed, but it did feel like it invalidated my relationship and made me frustrated that I wasn't sure how to respond.

Read the entire item.


Glossary:
  • A microassault is an explicit verbal or nonverbal attack meant to hurt the intended victim through name-calling, avoidant behavior, or purposeful discriminatory actions.
  • A microinsult is characterized by communications that convey rudeness and insensitivity and demean a person's racial heritage or identity. Microinsults represent subtle snubs, frequently unknown to the perpetrator, but clearly convey a hidden insulting message to the recipient of color.
  • Microinvalidations are characterized by communications that exclude, negate, or nullify the psychological thoughts, feelings, or experiential reality of a minority person.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Free Bird, Free Wine

[cuz LifeLube loves our lady friends, freedom, free vino, and the movies]

"..playful, sexy, tragic and contemplative" and an "addictive soap about sexuality and sisterhood." - New York Time

"What does the modern woman want? Where does she fit in today’s world?"

Never before in our collective human history have so many women had such autonomy to construct a life of their own creation. Yet, the terrain is still rocky and 'choice' does not necessarily bring happiness, let alone freedom. Meanwhile, old models of femaleness still haunt women everywhere.

In this six-hour tour de force, FLYING: CONFESSIONS OF A FREE WOMAN, master storyteller Jennifer Fox lays bare her own turbulent life to penetrate what it means to be a free woman today. As her drama of work and relationships unfolds over four years, our protagonist travels to over seventeen countries to understand how diverse women define their lives when there is no map. Employing an ingenious new camera technique, called “passing the camera”, Fox creates a documentary language that mirrors the special way women communicate.

Over intimate conversations around kitchen tables from South Africa to Russia, India and Pakistan, she initiates a groundbreaking dialogue among women, illuminating universal concerns across race, class and nationality. Part delectable soap opera, sociopolitical inquiry, and narrative experiments, FLYING sweeps us up into an addictive international adventure chronicled with sincerity, innovation and elegance.

Click here for screening info, including dates in Chicago beginning September 14.

Special Invite!
Zohe Films invites you to a WINE RECEPTION with filmmaker, Jennifer Fox, to celebrate the Chicago Premiere of FLYING: CONFESSIONS OF A FREE WOMAN! The reception will be held in the Gene Siskel Theatre directly after the screening on FRI. SEPT. 14th @ 8:15 pm. All those who attend the screening are welcome. Free wine and conversation with the filmmaker!


Saturday, April 14, 2007

Our Prejudices, Ourselves - Fierstein in NYT

This is EXCELLENT. Must read!
Click here if you want to read it on the NYT site. Otherwise, the whole thing is pasted here for your pleasure.
Love him.
Jim

-------------------------------------------

Op-Ed Contributor
Our Prejudices, Ourselves


By HARVEY FIERSTEIN
Published: April 13, 2007



AMERICA is watching Don Imus’'s self-immolation in a state of shock and awe. And I’m watching America with wry amusement.


Since I’m a second-class citizen — a gay man — my seats for the ballgame of American discourse are way back in the bleachers. I don’t have to wait long for a shock jock or stand-up comedian to slip up with hateful epithets aimed at me and mine. Hate speak against homosexuals is as commonplace as spam. It’s daily traffic for those who profess themselves to be regular Joes, men of God, public servants who live off my tax dollars, as well as any number of celebrities.

In fact, I get a good chuckle whenever someone refers to “the media” as an agent of “the gay agenda.” There are entire channels, like Spike TV, that couldn’t fill an hour of programming if required to remove their sexist and homophobic content. We’ve got a president and a large part of Congress willing to change the Constitution so they can deprive of us our rights because they feel we are not “normal.”

So I’m used to catching foul balls up here in the cheap seats. What I am really enjoying is watching the rest of you act as if you had no idea that prejudice was alive and well in your hearts and minds.

For the past two decades political correctness has been derided as a surrender to thin-skinned, humorless, uptight oversensitive sissies. Well, you anti-politically correct people have won the battle, and we’re all now feasting on the spoils of your victory. During the last few months alone we’ve had a few comedians spout racism, a basketball coach put forth anti-Semitism and several high-profile spoutings of anti-gay epithets.

What surprises me, I guess, is how choosy the anti-P.C. crowd is about which hate speech it will not tolerate. Sure, there were voices of protest when the TV actor Isaiah Washington called a gay colleague a “faggot.” But corporate America didn’t pull its advertising from “Grey’s Anatomy,” as it did with Mr. Imus, did it? And when Ann Coulter likewise tagged a presidential candidate last month, she paid no real price.

In fact, when Bill Maher discussed Ms. Coulter’s remarks on his HBO show, he repeated the slur no fewer than four times himself; each mention, I must note, solicited a laugh from his audience. No one called for any sort of apology from him. (Well, actually, I did, so the following week he only used it once.)

Face it, if a Pentagon general, his salary paid with my tax dollars, can label homosexual acts as “immoral” without a call for his dismissal, who are the moral high and mighty kidding?

Our nation, historically bursting with generosity toward strangers, remains remarkably unkind toward its own. Just under our gleaming patina of inclusiveness, we harbor corroding guts. America, I tell you that it doesn’t matter how many times you brush your teeth. If your insides are rotting your breath will stink. So, how do you people choose which hate to embrace, which to forgive with a wink and a week in rehab, and which to protest? Where’s my copy of that rule book?

Let me cite a non-volatile example of how prejudice can cohabit unchecked with good intentions. I am a huge fan of David Letterman’s. I watch the opening of his show a couple of times a week and have done so for decades. Without fail, in his opening monologue or skit Mr. Letterman makes a joke about someone being fat. I kid you not. Will that destroy our nation? Should he be fired or lose his sponsors? Obviously not.

But I think that there is something deeper going on at the Letterman studio than coincidence. And, as I’ve said, I cite this example simply to illustrate that all kinds of prejudice exist in the human heart. Some are harmless. Some not so harmless. But we need to understand who we are if we wish to change. (In the interest of full disclosure, I should confess to not only being a gay American, but also a fat one. Yes, I’m a double winner.)

I urge you to look around, or better yet, listen around and become aware of the prejudice in everyday life. We are so surrounded by expressions of intolerance that I am in shock and awe that anyone noticed all these recent high-profile instances. Still, I’m gladdened because our no longer being deaf to them may signal their eventual eradication.

The real point is that you cannot harbor malice toward others and then cry foul when someone displays intolerance against you. Prejudice tolerated is intolerance encouraged. Rise up in righteousness when you witness the words and deeds of hate, but only if you are willing to rise up against them all, including your own. Otherwise suffer the slings and arrows of disrespect silently.

Harvey Fierstein is an actor and playwright.

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